Expert: Cynthia Bedell - 1/19/2009

Question
My ex-husband is enlisting in Active Army.  Basic starts Feb. 9th.  
I need to know how to get our son (6) a military id card and how I go about setting up medical, dental and prescription info.  I have asked my ex- husband and he stated he would send consent forms from Basic to his current wife and his current wife would get a military id and then take all age appropriate children and my son who is 6 (and lives with me), to get military id cards.
I do not want to send my son with her (he has only known her for 6 months) and do not see why they will not send the forms directly to me.  I am his mother.  My son lives with me and it makes no sense why my ex and his wife tell me that I have no rights and if I do not let her take my son to get his military id, I am costing him his medical coverage.
Please let me know what I can do or who I can call.  My ex lives in Minnesota with a new wife and 6 kids (none of which my ex is the father of.)   My son lives with me in Wisconsin.


Answer
Dear Kari --

With your divorce decree, your son's birth certificate, and a DD form 1172 signed by your husband, with his military data on it.  You can register your son with DEERS yourself, and get him his ID card.  The ID card will allow him onto military posts as necessary (and you with him until he turn 18) and allow him to get his Tricare medical insurance.  You will have to take the above documentation to the nearest military base where they process military ID cards.

If your husband is trying to use his enlistment to pressure you to give up your son, you do not have to accept that.  You can contact his chain of command and provide them a copy of your son's birth certificate, and request that they ask your ex to fill out the DD form 1172 so your son gets the military benefits he is authorized.  Tell your ex-husband, if he does not send the DD form 1172 for your son's ID to you, that you will contact his chain of command with proof that you have legal custody of your son.  He must comply with the child support as stated in the divorce decree, and provide for your son.

Please write back, if you have additional questions.  Good luck to you all.