Expert: Cynthia Bedell - 8/11/2009

Question
Hi, my son's father is in the Navy and just went over sea. He told me that in order for our son to keep his medical and dental insurance I woululd have to give him and his wife full custody of our son. I dont believe him and my son has always lived with me. Is he telling the truth?

Answer
Dear LaTonya --

No!  He is not telling the truth.  All your son needs is a DD form 1172 and a copy of his birth certificate showing his father is the Sailor in question, to register your son in DEERS to keep his medical benefits.  To keep his dental benefits, the father will have to pay for dental insurance for your son, which is about 17 dollars a month.

If the father will not take care of his biological son, you may have to sue the father in court to establish paternity.  However, you should first explain to him that you know you do not have to grant him custody, and if he won't meet his legal obligations to his son, you will sue him and force the issue.  

Do not let the father blackmail you into giving him full custody of your son.  Further, the father owes you child support for his son, and you can sue him for that support also.

Please write back, if you have additional questions.  Good luck to you and your son.