Expert: MARK A. HOWELL - 9/23/2009

Question
Im currently serving in the military and ive currently been on Limited duty status for 5 months. I ve Been diagnosed with Panic/anxiety disorder. First the game plan with my mental health providers was to see if through limited duty they could create more of a stress free enviorment such as no deployments, no weapons..etc while i continue through therapy till i get out of the military. Well any one who been around military knows when ever your on limited duty status you get harassed and chewed out by your command allot because you have limitations. Its be getting worse lately with my command and my command is try to get around my Limited duty status and trying to force me to do things i don't feel i can do. Now there trying to make me deploy and do other stuff im in no shape to do. Well after i informed my mental health care providers they referred me to base legal cause of what my command was doing. Before i had a chance to go, my Superior found out and chewed me out real bad to point now that i feel like im about to have a meltdown. He told me by tomorrow i have to tell him if i feel i can continue with military life and he said if i cant he will get someone who can and get rid of me. Im terrified now on what to do. With all honesty i don't feel i can continue with military life but i don't believe its that simple to go and say to mental health "i cant take this i want out" even if its the way i feel. because there's probably a ton of people out there who fake illness and come in and say that stuff. I do have a mental disorder recorded now. do i have a shot at getting out? Im so worried and so depressed on what to do right now and that im getting pulled back and forth between my mental health care providers and my command. While i was in iraq i first started showing signs of my illness i also was having thoughts of hurting myself and occasional thoughts of suicide. Recently due to all this stress im starting to get these thoughts of hurting myself and suicide again..can someone please help me i don't know what to do and i feel like im becoming more unstable.

Answer
Jack,
It seems to me you're in an ideal situation at work.  The worst they can do to you is put you out and that seems to be in your best interest right now.  Not everyone is cut out for the stress of military life.  You gave it your best shot and it doesn't seem to work for you.  There's no shame in having tried.  If you hadn't tried you may be wondering for the rest of your life if you could do it or not.  Now you know.  Another lesson learned and some more experience to add to your resume of life.  You wouldn't believe how many requests I get from kids who want to experience Iraq.  You can easily say, "Been there, done that."

You've been talking to most of the right people, but there's one you didn't mention.  The Chaplain.  Next I'd recommend you go to the base Chaplain.  Whether or not you're religious, the Chaplain can be a powerful ally and I guarantee he'll listen to you.  Right now you need someone to intervene on your behalf rather quickly and he knows how to do it.  There's an old saying in the military..."Nobody (messes) with the Chaplain."  Any good commander usually avoids confrontations with a Chaplain.

It may sound unusual but that's what I'd do.
Good luck and let me know what happens.
Colonel H