Expert: Don Wood - 10/30/2004

Question
im sooo ugly! i dunno what to do and im freaking out cause i looked at some pics my friend got developed and i look horrible! every single one of my pics is ugly! my face is all long and stuff omg! but ive had ppl tell me im pretty, and in the mirror i dont look that bad, so waht is going on?! cause my friends all look the same in their pics, so is that really what i look like?!  

Answer
Everyone is hypercritical of themselves. Have you really looked at yourself in the mirror. Take the pics with you in the bathroom and examine yourself in the mirror in the pose that is in the picture. Were the poses themselves conducive to the picture appearing ugly to you? I wouldn't worry about it, in my experience of taking bridal photographs, I've had some girls come in that were less than photogenic, but guess what, when I photographed them in their wedding outfit, they were entirely different.  I know that telling you not to worry about it will not help you much. It is really what is inside the person that determines their popularity. Beauty is only skin deep, it's an extremely true adage. Remember the story of the ugly little duckling that grew up to be a beautiful swan. Perhaps that will be you later in life.
Did the photographer catch you in terrible poses? Did he deliberately change the angle of the photograph to emphasize a bad feature? Answer the questions, then forget what you were worrying about, focus on your schoolwork, job, family, social life. Be the best you can be is a good motto.
Good luck to you. Please be patient, allow yourself to grow into maturity. Don't rush into doing things that may prove injurious to you, smoking, drugs, drinking, etc. Think about what you're doing, then wait a while before doing it. An example of this is that when my kids wanted a toy and I had the money for it, I'd put it on the mantel piece and tell them that we would buy it in two weeks. Usually at the end of the 2 weeks, they'd have discovered something else that they needed. Think about it.
If I can help further, please let me know. Thanks for writing.
Don