Expert: Dear Tabbi - 5/20/2008

Question
Hi,
i adopted 2 6-month old kittens (brother & sister) 12 weeks ago. The kittens were semi-feral and didn't have much human contact in the first couple of montnhs of their life.
Since having the kittens, the female has come on superb, she lets me stroke her tummy and under her chin, and will sleep on my lap etc.  However the male kitten will not be stroked and since i can't touch him i can't get him to the vet for a check up. i've tried toys and stroking with feathers and he will take food from my hand, and he does like to follow me about.  Any ideas of what i can try next? as information on semi-feral kittens/cats is very sparce

Any suggestions greatly appreciated

Answer
Gail,

It is a frustrating chore that requires LOTS of time, patience, and love. Feral kittens or kittens from a feral parent bring a lot of baggage with them. They have an inbred and inherited distrust of humans. They are not like regular housecats and will not behave or act like regular cats.

When (and if) they tame down they will usually only bond with one person. They can be loveable, play, follow you, or lay next to you but rarely do they like to be held or restrained, nor petted for very long. You need to watch for the signs they have had enough BEFORE one attacks. The tail is the key. If your cat starts twitching his tail in a jerky fashion it's time to leave him alone...NOW!

Your male cat may take MONTHS for him to learn to trust you. Sometimes it never happens. It is good that the female is letting you touch her because he is absorbing everything you do with her and learning from it. Food is a great bribe. Get some tuna, pieces of sardines (in oil), etc., and put it near you, preferably with you sitting on the floor, then ignore him. Let him get confident about approaching you without you trying to touch him. If he doesn't like to be touched then he will bolt if you move. If you ignore him he will relax a little. Cats do not like to be ignored, even wilder cats. Try completely ignoring him for about 3 days. See if he starts to come to you for some affection. If you do touch him, do it very briefly and stop. As time goes on make the touches longer. When you are not ignoring him talk gently to him as much as you can. These are some ways to  work with him. Try what seems to work best with him, but remember it may take a long time. And try not to stand over him, get down to his level. To him you are a big, tall, scary threat.

You can try putting cat treats in a carrier with the swinging front closure, at first with the door off. Let him get brave enough to go into the carrier to get his treats without you doing anything, just being in the vicinity. After a few times of him doing that, put the door back on and when you want to take him to the vet, snap the door closed when he is in there. Don't miss! You will lose what you have gained. Plus after a trip to the vet he may not like you or trust you again for awhile. But every experience to him is a learning experience.

DO NOT look them directly in the eyes. That is a threatening gesture. When you pet the cat, pet from behind the head. Do not come at the cat with your hand from the front. Wilder cats see that as a threat and strike or bite first before they realize you are just petting them. Watch him for signs of what he likes and doesn't like as far as being touched...and respect that.

They are very sensitive to the tone of your voice and can pickup on displeasure, anger, and frustration (AND love and kindness). If you yell at them for any reason it can damage their bond with you and make them increasingly wary or anxious of being approached or handled by people.

Do not play rough with the kittens with your hands. There is a fine line with them between playing and turning on you. Getting a pet laser light (Petsmart/Petco/etc.) is a very good interactive toy. They love to chase the 'little red bug' on floors, walls and ceilings! It also helps the kittens bond with you and gain confidence.

Give them a raw beef rib bone periodically as a treat to chew on. Go to the supermarket and have the butcher cut some beef ribs in half. Though some cats don't care for meat, most cats enjoy them. It satisfies the hunting and 'fresh kill' instinct that is inherited in some cats. Especially if they are indoor cats and can't go outside to satisfy the urge to hunt. Plus the fibers in the meat cleans their teeth.

To help relax your kitties You can try a popular cat calming spray, or plug-in, called Feliway (or Comfort Zone with Feliway). It is available at pet stores, from a vet (they use it too), or on-line. It copies relaxing pheromones that cats produce from rubbing their faces on things.

There is another cat calming product that you can add to their food or water that reduces anxiety called Bach's Rescue Remedy. It is available on-line and in health food stores. Here is a link about it: (copy and paste, or type the whole links into your address bar)
http://www.bachflower.com/Pets.htm

To search for articles: go to Google and type:
SOCIALIZING SEMI-FERAL KITTENS
(or) TAMING SEMI-FERALS
You should find quite a few articles.

I hope this information will help you. It is a nice thing you are doing and those kitties are very lucky to have you. It will take time but the end result will be rewarding. Keep me posted on how they are progressing.

Tabbi