Expert: Dear Tabbi - 3/8/2009

Question
The first section I already submitted and my concerns were addressed very well. I am simply including this section to give you an idea of how we have come to this situation. Please see below. Thank you.
.........1st section............
      My grandmother recently passed this December and she loved her female calico cat 'Spicy' so very much. I could never let anything happen to this cat therefore I will be taking her home with me sometime soon. Spicy is 9 years old and very unsociable. When my grandmother first got her as a kitten she was very playful and affectionate. Yet over time, living in a quiet house with no one really to 'play' with, Spicy began isolating herself. Rarely, she would come out from hiding, and sit on my grandmother's lap. My Grandmother could say "Give me a kiss", and Spicy would nudge her head against my grandmothers lips and chin. Other than that, Spicy really doesn't socialize. Spicy would hide so often anytime my Grandmother had company that very few people even knew what she looked like! She would come out when I was around, but she would never let anyone, other than my grandmother, pet her.
So now I'm worried about how she will adjust in my home. My apartment is much smaller than my grandmother's house, also my husband and I may be moving sometime soon. (I may wait to find this out first because two moves maybe too much for poor Spicy.) Additionally, I have a cat of my own, 'Baby Black', a male American Short-hair. Both Spicy and Baby Black lived together at my grandmother’s house for about 4 years while I was away for college (both are fixed and declawed in the front). Baby Black has been moved out and living with me for about 3 years now. They got along fine when they lived together but it was Spicy's home and not vice versa. (Baby Black adjusts well to anything!)
      Basically, my concerns are this: What can I do to adjust Spicy (Ms. Anti-Social) to her new home? Will she remember Baby Black? Will his presence help in her adjustments? What preparations can I make to ease Spicy into such a sudden change? Please any advice will be helpful. I'm sure I could go on and on with more questions. I am so worried about this move that I'm going insane. I would die if I gave poor Spicy a heart attack or something over this whole ordeal. Please Help!
Thank you,
  Jess


.............2nd section...............

  This question was initially answered very well with tips on how to adjust her to a new home and etc. Since I first submitted this question to an “all expert” I have had Spicy in my home for almost three weeks. The first week Spicy would not eat anything at all. During the second week she began coming out of hiding to eat and use the litter box when no one was around. I am keeping her in our second bedroom to keep my cat and her separated. Whenever anyone is in the room Spicy would stay in hiding under a recliner. However during this present week Spicy has instead chosen to hide behind the recliner as oppose to hiding underneath. I have since then attempted to talk softly to her while she looks up at me. Three times this week Spicy has made deliberate attempts to attack me. The first occurred when I attempted to lure her from hiding by offering her a piece of tuna. I put a very small piece of tuna fish between my thumb and index finger and she (without warning) bit me puncturing my index finger, and biting through the side of my thumb next to the nail. This puncture wound has began healing fine, however she attempted to attack me a second time yesterday while I was talking to her. This time she was again behind the recliner and I placed my hand on the floor about a foot away from her to attempt establishing trust. Instead Spicy lunged at my hand hissing and growling. I immediately shouted “No!” and removed my hand from her attack. She was not able to get a hold of me that time. Now today I was changing the clock in the bedroom, while Spicy was again hiding behind the recliner. As I was changing the clock about a foot and a half away I began talking to her. When I went to place the clock back on the wall Spicy lunged forward from her hiding spot directly at me knocking over several small items that were sitting on our file cabinet. The file cabinet is about two feet high! She slammed into the side of the file cabinet and was not able to reach me, however the deliberate attempt of trying to rip me to shreds was very apparent. I am deeply concerned now. I am afraid that merely coming in the room will begin setting her off. What can I do in this situation? Does she feel threatened after the move? Any suggestions would greatly help.
Thanks,
Jess


Answer
Jess,

For one thing Spicy is VERY stressed, upset, and angry. You are available for her to take it out on. She also probably blames you for her not being with your grandmother, and for taking her away from all that was familiar.

I would leave her alone!! She sees you as a threat, and until she learns to trust you, and she figures out that you are not going to hurt her, she will probably get worse if you keep trying to force her to make friends with you.  She has made behind the recliner her 'safe place' and you are invading that space with your hands so she doesn't feel safe. DO NOT put your hand towards her (or any other body parts)! That is a threatening gesture and she will instinctly strike. She doesn't know what is going on and she will try to protect herself. If she hisses or growls, her ears go back, or her tail swishes, that is a warning and you need to pay attention or you could get injured. Do not look her in the eyes either. That is also a threatening gesture.

It sounds like it was normal for Spicy to keep hidden at your grandmother's and only come out periodically. Your grandmother accepted that so the cat made the attention she received on her terms. She sounds like she was a spooky cat anyway so I doubt very much she will change her personality. She will more than likely just withdraw more.  

You have her age against her, the fact that she is a calico, and she is grieving, confused, and unhappy with the sudden changes in her life. She has a new home, new people, new routines, new cats, new smells, and at her age, she will not adapt  to these changes as easily as a younger cat would, if she does at all.

Here is a link to a good article about Separation Anxiety that you may find helpful:
(copy and paste, or type, the whole link into your address bar)

http://www.hilltopanimalhospital.com/anxiety4.htm

Be careful of open doors. When a cat has an attitude like she seems to, she may try to dart out the door to get away, and may even try to go back to her old home. Cats do not have any reasoning abilities and they do not have any concept of what death is. They go by routine, habit, and smell. If you can, I would try to bring any items from your grandmother's house that may have a familiar smell to them, such as bedding where the cat might have slept, a sweater of your grandmothers, toys, etc. Anything that is familiar will be comforting to her.

As a general rule, calicos are one person cats, they are territorial, and a lot of times they have attitudes and can act like they have PMS.  Spicy had her territory at your grandmothers, but she doesn't have one now, except for her little spot behind the recliner. Respecting that 'space', and understanding why she is behaving that way will make for a more harmonious living situation.

You can try putting tuna, sardines in oil, or other strong smelling treats in a dish near her. If she comes to eat it, sit quietly and don't make any movements towards her, maybe just speak gently to her. As she comes to trust you, you can gradually keep moving the food or treats closer to you until she is eating next to you or close to you without running. The older a spooky cat is, the harder it is to gain their trust. You can only try.

Spicy may end up bonding with your husband instead of you. It is hard to tell what she will do and how she will handle it. As I mentioned before....it will take time, patience, and understanding. I would wear some leather gardening gloves if you are in her strike or bite zone. Bites can be vicious and painful from an angry or scared cat.

You can talk to your vet about putting her on an anti-anxiety medication to see if that will help, but I doubt you would be able to administer it on a regular basis, unless it was put in her food or water.

I would let her have her 'safe' place and keep her water, food, and litterbox close by and let her gradually come out as she feels comfortable. She may not ever want to be social, and she may live in her little 'safe' place behind the recliner for a quite a long time. If she doesn't want attention, affection, petting, etc.....don't! At least for now.

Moving again, may not be that much additional stress to her because, by then, you, your family, and your cat will be familiar to her. It won't be like now where she is going into a totally unfamiliar world with unfamiliar people. She may not ever 'like' you, but hopefully she will come to accept you and your family.

Baby Black (I had a Black Black!) may help to comfort Spicy (someone from her 'planet'!), and he may make her feel more secure. OR she may not accept him at all. Try feeding them special kitty treats (tuna, etc.) close to each other. That is so they will associate the other with something pleasant instead of negative.

Let them associate...briefly at first, with your not being where she can see you to stress her, but be ready to intervene if it looks like there will be more serious problems than the normal getting-acquainted behavior. Hissing, growling, and slapping is normal 'kitty communication' and not worrisome unless there is blood being shed or serious fur flying.

I'm guessing that you didn't get the dog crate that I mentioned in your previous answer. With a large one (mine is 36x32x48) you can put a cat carrier for her to hide in with a towel over it, plus food and water dishes, and a litter box, and still have room. One benefit is that you can keep it where the people mostly come and go (den, kitchen, living room) so she has a better chance of getting used to the movements and voices of the family, the sounds, the smells, and can also get to know your other cat safely.

I hope what I said made some kind of sense. Keep me posted on how things are progressing with her. I think it will work itself out when she adjusts and acclimates, but it will take time and patience....time and patience....time and patience! Feel free to ask any questions, anytime.

Tabbi