About Dear Tabbi Expertise My expertise is in helping people understand their cat (or cats) and their behavior. Questions are welcome even if you don't have a cat....just a question about them. Hopefully my experience, suggestions, and comments will be of help to you...and your cat (or cats). Looking through my past responses to questions will give you additional information and/or answers too.
Domestic Cats = cats (no matter what breed) who are tame or not wild, or abandoned cats who were pets that became wild, but can be tamed again.
Ferals = cats who are born with one or more parents who were wild stray cats. They usually have had no interactions with people. They have an inbred distrust of humans and are difficult to socialize. They are skittish, hide, and are afraid of people. They take a lot of time and patience to work with them. A lot of kittens from shelters had a feral parent.
Experience Since I was a child, over 45 years, I have been owned by a LOT of cats and kittens of almost every temperament, behavior, and personality. I have had experience with neurotic, disabled (including blind), stray, and 'problem child' cats and kittens. (A few normal cats too!) Plus all the things a lifetime of owning cats and research has taught me. I also have experience in feral cat behavior (which is different from domestic cats), and some experience with feral colonies that includes colony feeding and feral cat TNR (trap/neuter/release).
Education/Credentials ***********
Awards and Honors * One of the top 50 Experts Of 2008 *
Question Hi,
Someone I know is bringing their cat over this Friday. They can no longer keep it because it gets into fights with their daughter's (who just came back from college) cat. She said the cat is nice (with that one exception), but it stays pretty distant and that we'll hardly ever see her. I've been reading some of the past posts and I'm guessing your gonna say she's feral? Anyways, whatever the problem is, I was wondering how to go about taking her in and what to do so she's not always hiding. I don't want her to hide, no one wants to hide all the time (or at least I don't think). Is there anything I can do to help with this fear of hers or is it absolutely permanent?
Thanx
Answer Beth,
You guessed right! Do you have a resident cat too or will she be the only cat? I ask because if you already have a cat you need to go through an introduction period, if you don't then that part isn't necessary.
Ferals and semi-ferals, as you have probably read by my previous answers, are not like domesticated housecats and won't behave like one. They like hiding because that is where they feel safe. I have a feral that no one has ever seen because the minute she hears a strange noise, or another person around, she is under the bed and doesn't come out until she is sure the noise or person is gone...so no one ever sees her.
I would put her in one room with a litter box, food, and water for about a week. Maybe your bedroom. Having the run of a new home can be too overwhelming. Let her investigate and expand her area gradually. Always leave her 'safe place' available to run back to.
Don't try to force her to be sociable. That will make her regress. It will take time and patience, but let her build her trust in you first. Let her take it at her own pace. When she trusts you and wants affection she will come to you. Talk to her quietly and let her get used to your voice and movements.
Food is a great bribe! Give her some tuna or tinned sardines in oil.
Let her associate you with something pleasant. Get a pet laser light from Petco/PetSmart/etc. That is a great interactive toy that helps bond cats and owners. She can play with you and not have any physical contact which will build trust. Pulling a shoestring or a rope helps too.
Cats are all different with different personalities, temperaments, experiences, etc. so no cat is "text-book" that one answer will fit all cats. My answer is a guide. You need to be around her and see how she is and make adjustments from there. But you both will do fine after you get used to each other and she acclimates to her new home and person.
If you have more questions now or after you get her send a followup.
