Expert: Griff Ruby - 3/18/2010

Question
Hi, my name is Brandy, I am 20, married and I have a two year old son. I have never been raised around religious beliefs, but now we are trying to find out way back to church. We are trying to figure out which way to go with Christianity, but I just can't figure it out. I have a feeling that I need to try Catholicism, but don't know much I would appreciate it very much if you could help me out. Thanks.

Answer
You have managed to ask a very large question in a very few words.  There is nothing like having a child and realizing the responsibility that makes one appreciate the value of what Church is all about.  As long as it is just ourselves doing our own thing it seems easy to do whatever, but there is something about a child which forces us to realize that we cannot afford to shirk our responsibilities in life and the things that are most important.  So now you find yourself wanting for your child something more than what you had, and you have come to realize that the something more is faith.
Now the question presents to you a bewildering array of various and competing "faiths" all seeking the status of that role in your life and your child's.  If it is merely a matter of having "something" of the sort which can be of practical benefit to a child's growing up, to provide him with some structure of friends or discipline or organization or ideals, probably anything would do adequately here.
And I might as well point out that at this time, not even the Catholic Church can offer anything of any advantage here over anything else.  Furthermore, being a practicing Catholic is these days far more difficult even that usual, since in addition to the high moral standards that Catholicism has always stood for (and always will), we must now deal with a Church which is significantly reduced in size (numbers) and weak and even divided, individual circumstances that have each had historical precedents, but never before all occurring simultaneously.
This gets down to the basic and far more fundamental question as to why one ought to be a Catholic instead of anything else.  Long gone are the days that we had better youth programs, better schools (with only the rarest of exceptions), a clear and visible public presence and role in general society, the ability to protect our youth from indecent communications as we once had in the Legion of Decency, a practical and local daily parish life in most areas, and so forth.  So why be Catholic?
I guess it starts with the question why be Christian?  If Jesus Christ really was God, come into the earth, to do all the things He did, and then be crucified to pay for our sins and then be raised from the dead as a promise of our own possible return from the dead, then the need is obvious.  If not, then everything I would have to say here would be valueless and you might as well simply look for whatever is convenient.
But given that Jesus Christ really is God the Son and all the rest of what Christianity is meant to be about, here is what authentic Catholicism is really all about.  Most Protestants readily know and admit that Jesus Christ was born of a virgin, travelled about ancient Judea preaching and teaching, working miracles, that He died on the Cross for our sins, and that He rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven.
What they don't know that that somehow, in and amongst all of what He did, He also found time to found a Church as well.  He gathers His disciples, trains them, sends them out to evangelize, sets one of them, St. Peter, in a unique role of authority, and guarantees that His Church so founded shall never disappear and never mislead anyone as to the teachings of Christ.  None of that is any "extra-scriptural" revelation, each of these facts is boldly and plainly stated in Holy Scripture itself.  That the Protestants, even "bible only" ones, could miss this I cannot figure, other than that this realization, once recognized for what it is, would be the end of Protestantism itself, for all of their churches sprung up centuries later and none can claim any continuity with that First Congregation.
It is therefore a question of wanting to be actually a part of what Christ is doing versus doing anything else that, however much it may mention Him, really has nothing to do with Him and operates without His authority and without His power.  The most anything of the sort could ever attain would be the status of an unauthorized "Jesus Christ fan club."
The Church that He founded on the other hand is not merely some organization that happens to have His blessing in some sense, but in fact His Mystical Body.  The Church is in fact meant to be a continuation of His own personal existence in this world to this very day, acting as a body to attain His goals in this world in a way that no decentralized "gathering" ever could.  He founded an authority structure to bring about His will in the earth and to sustain it to the end of time.
So far, so good, and obviously only the Catholic Church can lay claim to this extraordinary legacy, and it is for this that the holy martyrs suffered much and died.  The goal for you and your child should be to be made of the very same "stuff" as those holy saints of old, not necessarily the easiest, the most "successful" in a worldly sense, and even not the most likely to survive, but certainly the most likely to be pleasing to one's Creator with whom one will be happy for all eternity.  But now (in the past 50 years or so) things have just gotten a great deal more complicated.
For nearly two thousand years the Church has carefully nailed down in absolute certainty what it believes, what it expects of us, how it operates, how God is to be worshipped, what really and objectively is right and wrong, and how to identify it.  Anyone familiar with that history and theology and divine sources (Scripture, Ancient Fathers, Doctors, Popes, Councils, Saints...) would at once know what (and who) is Catholic and what (and who) is not.  But that is a massive study outside the reach of many.
A much shorter approach will demonstrate the same exact thing, however.  Find an older catechism (from no later than the 1950's), the more detailed the better.  Then look for the Church that catechism describes.  A good catechism to use for this is called "My Catholic Faith."  Reprints of editions of it from that time period are easy to find and cheap, but the quality and detail of information unsurpassed.  The Church described in that catechism is the Church as known to the Apostles of old, and which necessarily survives to this day.  It can be purchased here:
http://www.amazon.com/My-Catholic-Faith-Louis-LaRavoire/dp/0963903268
The problem enters in that within the past 50 years there was a massive defection from that Faith (and Church as well, though few realized it at the time since practically a whole organization separated itself from what little remained (and remains) of the Church, thus deceiving them), and now authentic Catholic churches are now few and far between.  Unless you happen to be situated near one of them, even seeing one will require something of a real pilgrimage on your part, and of course one would have to do without the practical and daily parish life that the Church once afforded to practically everyone that is so helpful in a child's social development.  In short, to follow God today one must make some real sacrifices and it will not be easy, but this is what God expects of His Church members today.
The real confusion factor is that a vast number of non-Catholics has come to be labelled "Catholics" and their non-Catholic organization a "Catholic Church" for decades, to the confusion of all, to the point that few today (proportionately speaking, though the actual number is still in the millions worldwide) know what a real Catholic is.  Just because it says "Catholic" on the front doesn't mean that what goes on therein has anything to do with Catholicism or the real Church at all.  Again I say, test it against a classical catechism.
Perhaps you may have heard of a "Latin Mass" group or movement or community.  "Latin Mass" is not merely the Mass said in Latin but in fact alone the Mass of the ages, as employed by the Church from the very beginning, in terms of the content, intent, and meaning of its many prayers and other sacramental actions.  One can think of it as kind of a "flag" or "banner" of the authentic Catholic Church today; a different "flag" signals a different church, with different doctrines, morals, practices, and with a clergy nearly all of whom can make no claim to valid or lawful orders.  One can find true centers of Catholicism with this Directory:
http://www.traditio.com/tradlib/masslat.pdf
And if you are curious about how the present situation regarding the Catholic Church came about, and how we can know where the real Catholic Church really is, my own book, The Resurrection of the Roman Catholic Church, which is known and recommended by all real Catholics who know of it, can be purchased here:
http://www.iuniverse.com/bookstore/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=SKU-000017725
or freely read online here:
http://www.the-pope.com/library.html#resurr
There are three possible scenarios, one that you are near one of the places where a true priest (or even bishop) normally resides, and where daily Mass can be found, together with all manner of school, and other community helps can be found, another where you are near only some "Mass location" in which some rented facility or even borrowed non-Catholic Church or what have you serves as the place for a visiting priest who comes in only on Sundays (and maybe only alternate Sundays or even only one a month), and yet another (most common) in which you are near none of them.  Let's take it from the easiest situation to the hardest.
In the first case, the easiest, you have there a full Catholic community to join which will provide you and your child with the most rock-solid spiritual foundation that will serve him and you well throughout life, and throughout eternity.  Go there, involves yourself, sign up, and they will instruct you all further into the ways of righteousness.
In the second case, at least you have a place for the Mass and the Sacraments, and perhaps religious instruction (both for him and for you), but the best thing to do there is to befriend other members of the congregation as may live anywhere near you, especially with children of anything near your son's age, such that you may visit them and they you for good fellowship that will go far towards providing a good social life for your child (and you as well).  In this case you will also need to look towards homeschooling (something other parents will also be doing, so they can help you in this, and gladly will) when the child gets older.
Finally, the last case (which is also my own, and in which my wife and I are endeavoring to raise our small son, now aged 4) is the most difficult.  In addition to trying to homeschool, but now perhaps having to homeschool with something more of a mixed group, Church is something one will have to make occasional pilgrimages to, frequency based upon how far one must travel.  In this case, it will do to load yourself up with good Catholic books by saints of old, and for children story books about the saints and the Bible (Catholic Children's Treasure Box is a great series, and the places that carry that will often carry much else good for children) and spend time with your child going over such books with them.
I didn't say it would be easy, or even that it would do "better" from an earthly or purely pragmatic standpoint, only that what the Church expects is what God expects, and alone is reliable for the best eternal development.
If nothing else, showing such importance for the spiritual things in life will prove, as an example, to be one of the strongest guides in the life of your son.  If he grows up seeing you doing the difficult thing because it is the right thing, then he will in time do the same when as an adult it is his turn to make the same choices.
Hope this helps, God bless!