Expert: Fr. Michael - 3/26/2011

Question
Fr. Michael,

I am young and not a virgin any long. I am not married. Which  goes against what I believe. But, the guy i have been having sexual relations with we plan to get married. But, I feel we should have waited. He agrees with me. So we stopped. I just wanted to know if there was a way to reclaim my virginity even if I cant physically. Or if it would be wrong to not wear a purity ring? I have changed my views on sex and believe that it is sacred and should be saved until marriage. I feel very bad that we didn't wait. But, at the time our views were that since we are going to get married it should be no big deal. But, we have grown and think differently now. Please let me know if there is a way to reclaim my virginity. Or if it is wrong to wear a purity ring now? Thank you for all of your help.

Answer
You have learned a very important moral lesson:  sin has its consequences and can never be taken back.  The only thing that you can do is to repent sincerely, approach the Sacrament of Penance, and have a firm purpose of amendment to avoid the proximate occasion of sin for the future.  The power of the Sacraments and the daily challenge to live a virtuous live far surpasses anything like wearing rings.