Hi, my name is John, how are you? I was wondering when a man and wife have sexual intercourse,  what types of thoughts should pop into his head? and what thoughts should not pop into his head? what if one quick thought pops into his head about a woman while make making love to his wife, but the thought quickly passes?

Thank you. I am single, but someday I want to be married, and I was wondering if it was sinful if durin sex  a thought pops up about another woman, but not fantazing about the other woman, the thought just pops up

I do not think a stray thought that pops into your head during marital relations is sinful.  One cannot necessarily control their thoughts.  One can only sin when one has full command of their faculties.

As for what thoughts you should be thinking, that is not something I can answer.  All I can say is that a stray thought or two is not sinful.


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Father Dave Bechtel


I am a Catholic priest in good standing and in active ministry in the Diocese of Scranton PA. I can answer most any question about the Catholic Faith, however my area of specialization is Systematic Theology. Systematic Theology is a branch of theology that focuses on the fundamental tenants of the Faith and the Dogmas of the Faith. I have specialization on the Reformation and Catholic vs. Protestant theology/issues and answering Protestant challenges to the Faith.


I was ordained in June of 2008. Since that time the thrust of my ministry has been specialized. In my first assignment I was an assistant pastor. A year later I was sent to work in education. I spent six (6) years in education and have now assumed my first pastorate. While education was the thrust of my ministry, nevertheless I continued to have a hand in parish ministry, hospital chaplaincy and prison chaplaincy. Now that I am out of education I will obviously be focusing more on parish work than specialized ministry. I have two years of formal Clinical Pastoral Education and prior to ordination I successfully pursued Board Certification for health care ministry through the NACC. My certification needs to be renewed and I plan to seek dual certification in health care ministry (NACC and APC) when I renew my certification. I have a breadth of experience working with Protestant ministers and collaborating with them to achieve the goals of hospital pastoral care and chaplaincy. These ministers run the spectrum from the liberal to the conservative.

Bachelors of Science-- University of Scranton PA Masters of Arts Theology--- Saint Mary's Seminary and University Baltimore MD Masters of Divinity--- Saint Charles Borremeo Seminary Philadelphia PA Board Certified Chaplain (up for renewal)

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