Expert: Tom Schott - 12/22/2007

Question
I am a Catholic, who attends a Baptist church for youth. I live in the South where the Catholic church isn't as common in a smaller town with few people my age to talk to about such matters and few groups to attend to ask such questions. I really appreciate your time and help. I asked one of the other experts in this area some similar questions, but while I'm sure he did his best to answer, i still feel my questions are unanswered.

Everyone else can verse me on what the Catholic church teaches. I know what the Catholic church teaches for the most part; I've researched some. What i need and what you've seemed to provided in past answers I've read is a more personal approach.

My main issues are those such as mixed marriages, birth control, and mortal and venial sins.

I don't understand why Catholics believe that the sacraments are the only way of salvation, or so it seems to me. The Catholic church sees fornication, masturbation, etc. as mortal sins. Almost everyone has committed some form of these acts. If Protestants do not receive the sacrament of reconciliation because they do not practice it, how will they receive salvation? Even if they live a holy life.

I don't understand the church's stance against birth control. What if families need to wait for children for financial reasons or need to set a limit for financial reasons? What if the person is just not emotionally prepared for children, but the marriage is open to them when ready? The church considers acts of foreplay wrong because they are not open to life. But what if the marriage is? What about sex for unity not just to procreate?

The church says that such acts are mortal sins. Which I'm sure you know means that if they're on your heart when you die, by what the Catholic church teaches, you will go to hell. Many Catholics who lead holy lives have just two or three children. Not all of them can be using NFP, by statistics. So does that mean the majority of the church is going to hell?

You've said in your past answers that the conscience is important. If you believe something is right in your conscience, that is important. Is it possible that the overall type of life you lead is more important than those individual acts? If i don't agree with the official standings of the church, should i start exploring other religions?

Thank you again for your time.

Answer
Catholic teachings seem so closed minded sometimes, and it's nice to know I'm not the only one who struggles with these issues.

I can assure you, dear, that you are not the only one who struggles with these issues. There are many, many Catholics who do. As for the teachings of the Church, remember that lots of times it depends on who's doing the teaching. Know what I mean? God bless.

Deacon Tom


Emily,

 There have been books written on these subjects. I can do more than simply give you an outline here. You are right; I have written about the primacy of conscience when it comes to moral decisions. But be aware that this primacy of conscience requires an =informed= conscience, that is, one that is fully aware of exactly what the Church teaches on the subject and why. That being said, let me observe that all the questions you ask are in the realm of morality, a subject that is rarely or never a black and white proposition.

 The Church distinguishes the severity of moral offenses by denoting them venial or mortal sins, but there is a huge degree of flexibility depending on the individual person. I would hesitate to proclaim that God measures our conduct in terms of mortal and venial sins. I am almost certain he does not. Which means our non-Catholic and non-Christian brothers and sisters can count on his mercy, forgiveness, and love just as we Catholics can. A confessional is not needed for that.

  I can tell you for certain that the Church does not believe the sacraments are the only way to salvation. The documents of Vatican II make it plain that salvation is available to all of humankind regardless of creed or religion. We are fortunate as Catholics to have the sacraments, but we certainly don't have a lock on salvation because of them. God is much broader-minded and good-hearted than that.

  The Church's position on birth control is rooted in a particular understanding of natural law. The Church has not changed its position despite an very strong recommendation to do so by papal-commission in the 1960s. As you observe, the vast majority of Catholics have simply ignored the official Church stance on this matter. In my opinion, this teaching will eventually be reversed. (Maybe not soon, but eventually.) It is already hardly a pressing matter in the Church. As you also observe, there are many reasons a married couple might want to practice birth control. If they can do so in good, informed conscience, they are certainly not guilty of sin. Consult what I said about judgments on moral questions in general.

I don't think the church or you or me can say what person is going to hell or what is going to send them there. That's God's business, and I leave it entirely up to him.

There are many, many millions of good Catholics who don't agree with the official teachings of the Church, I would certainly trust you don't abandon the church because of your problems with some of its teachings. In fact, you are not likely to find any church where you agree with all of its teachings.

Merry Christmas