Expert: Fr. Timothy Johnson - 12/11/2007

Question
QUESTION: Father:
I'm a Roman Catholic and I've been dating a devout Jehovah's Witness woman for more than a year. We don't talk much about religion to one another simply because we refuse to do so. I go w/ family and friends to church every Sunday. I am planning on marrying her i love her dearly. We get along well in spite of the religious difference.  What is the process we need to go to to marry one another. Is it a must that I marry in a catholic church? What if she cant? Raising children: I have one more questions in an interfaith situation like I am in. Can children be exposed to both religions growing up, for example she can take them to the Kingdom Hall and I can take them to Mass on Sundays? I really like this girl but I don't think we can ever convince one another in converting.

thanks for any advice. Xander

ANSWER: Hi, Xander:

It sounds like she's devout about being a Jehova's Witness, but you are lax about being a Catholic?  It is hard to tell by the information you give; but you certainly did not describe yourself as a "devout Catholic"...
Do you attend to all of your Catholic obligations and religious devotions and practices?
If not, then you probably don't care, and will do just whatever you as the own center of your life wish to do;
if so, then you will recognize that you are bound by Canonical Form, and would need to see a Priest to go through the proper procedure for a Catholic to get married by the Authority of the Catholic Church (see my many descriptions of this in past answers).
Children are exposed to a myriad of things and influences, all around them, some good, some not...
In an interfaith marriage, the Catholic makes a promise to raise the kids Catholic.  This is because the Catholic Church makes the public claim that she is the very Church founded by Jesus Christ.
I think that you are probably correct in ascertaining a low probability of her converting.
I ascertain a high probability that, in your present state of mind, you will descend into an attitude of religious indifferentism and relativism, and the Catholic Faith will be lost to your children, and to the succeeding generations.
Unlike the mainline Protestant Churches, the JW's are not historic break-offs from the Catholic Church.  Their doctrines are the revival of very ancient heresies, such as Arianism, that is heterodox in its understanding of the Divine Nature of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the WORD made flesh...
For a lifelong vocation as a Catholic, you are toying with embarking upon a serious impediment to the practice of the Catholic Faith, if that is important to you.

Fr. Timothy Johnson

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: I consider myself a devout Catholic, Father and I have gone through catechism/confirmation. That was years and years ago in grade school. I am now 27 years old. Can you provide me with more reading material and information about Canonical Form and marriage within in the authority of the catholic church. I am not considering converting as I have a family of all Roman Catholic. Please, I am reaching for help in this matter. Sometimes I have wavering feelings because I've spoken to family and they tell me that down the line it is religion that will bind a married couple happily together until the end. Thank you for the help, in advance.

Answer
Hi, again, Xander:

Canonical Form is the law of the Catholic Church, binding upon baptized Catholics.  It means that a Catholic getting married must approach his/her Pastor for marriage preparation and fulfill the requirements of the local Diocese.  In this formation, you would hopefully learn about the Universal Law of the Catholic Church that a Catholic under Canonical Form:

1. Must get married by an authorized Roman Catholic Priest or Deacon.
2. Must get married in a Church Building in a Catholic Liturgical Rite.
3. In the presence of two witnesses.

In order to go thru some other public form of marriage, the Catholic must receive a "Dispensation from Canonical Form."  In addition, in your case if you marry somebody who is Jehova's Witness, you would also have to get a "Dispensation for Disparity of Cult", since you would be marrying a non-Christian; and you must also sign a paper that you will raise the children as Catholics.
You are right to be concerned about the future of a marriage in which you do not share the same Faith with your spouse.

Fr. Timothy Johnson