Expert: Fr. Michael - 6/1/2006

Question
Dear Father, I am a cradle Catholic and have been married to the same lovely woman for 34 years. I am 57 years old and my wife is 52. Our problem is we haven't had sex in over a year. My wife had a complete hysterectomy 10 years ago after having 5 children. I am at a point in my life where I do not get a complete erection which prevents us from having intercourse. We can satisfy each other by touching but we stopped because the church teaches we must always be open to Pro Creation. We also stopped having relations because we are not sure what is allowed. Since my wife is sterile and I have my problem, may we explore other means or is our sex life over. It's been a difficult year for me and find my self having more impure thoughts than normal. My wife has no difficulty with being celibate. I'm the problem. Am I being selfish? I pray when I have powerful urges. I committed a sin of impurity with myself 1 time this year and I felt terrible and went to confesstion. Any suggestions? Thank you, Father.

In Christ,
Thomas

Answer
Some questions are of a highly personal or individual
nature that it would not be possible to discuss by E-mail.  These are questions on which you would most appropriately be given advice and counsel by your own confessor, who can come to know you and knowledgeably guide your spiritual life.

If you do not have a regular traditional confessor, you should consult the Official Traditional Catholic Directory to find one as conveniently local to you as is available.  
Sometimes it may take some effort, but in that effort you will enhance the grace of Faith and will develop a relationship with a confessor who can personally
come to know your spiritual state and prudently guide you.
www.traditio.com/tradlib/masslat.txt