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I never thought i would have to ask a question like this, but here it goes.
My tiny cat 'Mee Moo' died on Thursday sometime in the morning we think. She was only 18 months old. She was always naughty and curious so when She hadn't come home for several hours which is highly unlike her, we (my boyfriend and I) went searching. We found her at the side of the road having been hit by a car. To say she didn't look like my cat was an understatement, but at least the person who had hit her had moved her to the side so as not to be hit again. We were beside ourselves and didn't know what to do, natural instinct told us to take her home and bury her in the back garden. This is what we did having to carry her through the house to get to the back garden.
I am not sure if when we got home our other cat 'Jack' was in, whilst Paul took 'Mee moo' out to the back garden i ran up stairs to be sick, so i didn't see him. We have since been told by various people that the smell of her going through the house would serverly distress 'Jack' had he been there. We didn't know this, is it true??
After the burial 'Jack' was no where to be seen, this is highly unlike him as he never goes out unless it is to go to the toilet or have a twenty min wander round the close. He never goes out at night. We searched for him but couldn't find him either. Eventually he wandered in and went straight to their beds and went to sleep. He didn't wake up for nearly 48 hours. Since he has been awake, he has not wanted us near him and does not seem interested in us at all. He is usually an avid lap cat and wont leave us alone. He is also not eating as much as he normally does only eating the bare min, and turning his nose up to his usual favs.

I consulted my vet and her response was that 'Jack' was lonely and that we should think about getting another cat within a few weeks. 'Jack' is five or six now (exact age unknown as he was a rescue), but still enjoyed play fighting, grooming and snuggling up with 'Mee Moo' - I feel that just 'replacing' her my confuse him. Also how would I introduce the two of them to each other and would he not resent the new cat. I have been advised to get a young female cat as this 'Jack' will find less threatening, but I don't know.
What do you suggest??
Another thing that worries me is that we are due to go on holiday in three weeks for a fortnight. JAck is due to stay at my parents house whilst we are away, but I'm worried about what this second upheaval will do to his already fagile state. (we would not think about getting this other cat untill we get back from holiday - which will be the end of May)
Also, since 'Mee Moo's' death I have been worried about leaving the cat flap open during the night as it seems this is when she went on her little expeditions. I believe this is why she was killed (she never went near the road in the day). Is it wrong to now keep the cat flap closed after dark??

Thanking you in advance for your help
Kelly

Answer
Hi
first of all can i say how sorry i am for your loss. I know how stressful and sad it is to loss a cat this way.
Ok to try and answer some of your questions.
I have never ever heard of the smell thing ie when you carried her through the house. this sounds very much like a myth to me.
However animals do experience grief whena nother animal dies or disappears. Jack may net be aware that she is dead, after all we do not know if animals understand death the same way as we do, all he probably knows is that she is gone, he doesn't know where and is missing her. However bringing another animal into the house so so soon can be very wrong. I will try to explain. Your cat knows his friend is missing, he will need time to come to terms with this loss, as we all do, if you bring another animals in, he may react badly thinking hey this is mine and Mee Moos territory and you are tresspassing. Until he has sufficient time to realise that the other cat is not coming back, he may not react well to another cat. I would wait for at least a couple of months, especially as like you say he will be going through another change ie your holiday, he will need time after that to re- adjust to his home environement again. He really won't need the extra stress of another animal. If and when you do decide to get another cat, yes getting a female cat is best as it will cause less conflict, i have a web page here which will help you to introduce your cats to each other here /introducing-cats.html

I have also written an article about animal grief, it may provide you with some information here is the link http://ezinearticles.com/?Do-Cats-Grieve-For-Their-Feline-Friends?&id=708972

I hope i have been of some help.
Best wishes
kate

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Kate Tilmouth

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I can answer most day to day cat problems encountered by owners. I have a good understanding of cat behaviour and problems which may arise from changes to their daily routine. I can advise on cat training including litter training and general day to day cat care issues. I am not a vet and therefore cannot answer medical questions.

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I run my own cat website at http://www.our-happy-cat.com and have been a dedicated cat owner for over 20 years. I have encountered many different cat problems and situations and feel that i have a good understanding of cats and cat ownership.

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I am a platinum member of Ezinearticles where i write mainly cat related articles.

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Educated to High School level and have since worked for many years in a customer support based environment, gaining vocational qualifications.

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