Expert: Ali - 8/22/2008

Question
I have a 13 yr. old female cat that I took in for a co-worker back in April since he was going through a divorce and had to move.  My problem is that she is quite aggressive.  I love her to death and think she is a beautiful cat, but nobody can seem to pet her.  Every time any one tries she hisses and turns around and tries to bite.  Now if she is to paw at you that is not such a big deal because he had her declawed.  The weird thing is, if I am sitting on my balcony with the screen door closed she will butt her head against the screen door and want you to put your hand down so she can playfully head butt your hand.  She will loving rub up against your legs while you are sitting and watching television, but no petting allowed.  I don't believe she was always this way because my co-worker seems surprised by her behavior.  Additionally, it has been 5 months and she still hisses and growls at my other cat.  Is there any way to train her and stop the aggression?

Answer
Charlene,

By the information you have provided I am going to assume that you didn't introduce the new cat to your resident cat properly. My first recommendation is that you house the 13 year old cat in a room on her own with food, water, litter, a comfy place to sleep and a few toys for 2-4 weeks depending on her progress. The idea behind this recommendation is to give your older girl some time to cool off. Since cats are very territorial and dislike change for the most part helping your two cats to get along isn't a matter of training in the traditional sense, it's more about giving them some time and space to cool off and prevent serious injuries from happening to one or both cats as a result of fighting over territory.

I am also assuming that the new kitty was an only cat for the majority of her life prior to coming to live in your home. Only cats tend to be somewhat like only children, they don't like to share and they are used to getting what they want, when they want it. I think that the aggression that you describe is partially because of the huge life changes that this kitty has endured over the past few months. It's tough on a cat to lose their home, people that they are bonded to and familiar with and routines that they are accustomed to. Your new cat has gone through all of this in addition to trying to learn how to live with another cat that she isn't attached to. This situation won't be cured overnight, it will take time, patience, love and as consistent of an environment as possible. You may find that having your co-worker visit your home and interact with the cat will help to ease her feelings of abandonment.

During the isolation period that I have recommended I would suggest that you spend quiet time with this kitty, but forget about initiating the affection for now. It sounds to me like this gal likes to have her affection on her own terms. What I would recommend is that you go into the room that the cat is isolated in and bring some sort of activity to take your focus off of her such as crocheting, reading, crosswords or sudoko puzzles. In the beginning don't make eye contact, don't touch the cat and don't talk to her. There is nothing wrong with responding to her when she comes to ask for affection, but failing that just take the time to allow her to accept you.

I am also recommending that you try administering a homeopathic remedy called Bach's Rescue Remedy which is a blend of flower essences that calms and reassures. This remedy is very safe, however I don't suggest that you administer it directly into her mouth. When you wash her water bowl and refill it each morning add 10 drops of Rescue Remedy the first day and 8 drops every day thereafter for the time that she is in isolation. You may find that it is necessary to continue with the Rescue Remedy after the isolation and if it appears to help this kitty be calmer then it's certainly worthwhile. You can usually find Rescue Remedy in health food stores, naturopathic pharmacies or stores promoting natural health. It's not a bad idea to start your resident cat on about 6 drops of Rescue Remedy per day, administered in the drinking water in just the same way as you are giving it to the new kitty, starting when the new kitty goes into isolation and continuing for at least a few days after the cats are reunited.

Play is a valuable tool in helping decrease stress and anxiety in cats just the same as it is in people, so it is certainly worth investing in some interactive toys like kitty teases or kitten mittens for both cats as well as toys that can be played with on their own time. I would recommend that you start play therapy with your resident cat immediately after isolating the new cat. Once the new kitty is showing signs of warming up and seeking affection you can start with interactive play to help facilitate bonding. Your new kitty will need to entertain herself with toys like mice and balls prior to settling down enough to be reliably and safely handled.

I would recommend that you take time to get your new kitty accustomed to handling once she is calmer. I routinely recommend that people introducing/reintroducing a cat to their resident cat use a hand towel to rub down the resident cat, then the new cat, then the resident cat and back to the new cat. What this does is provide each cat with a mixture of their own scent and the other cat's scent. A "step-down" measure of sorts can be attempted when your new cat is settled down some. I would recommend that you consider borrowing or investing in a newer baby gate and having the cats eat supervised on either side of it prior to allowing them to associate with one another freely. If you are concerned about the potential for injury to your resident cat then you can substitute a cat carrier for the baby gate. I must stress that the recommendations in this paragraph not be tried until you feel confident handling the new cat, essentially calm, confident, gentle and assertive handling will be key to get both cats to become more comfortable with each other in the long run.

I hope that this information helps. If you have any further questions, concerns, or you would simply like to send some pictures or an update my way, please don't hesitate to contact me again.