I just got a maine coon male - he's about 6 months old, and he plays way too rough with my other two cats. He's about 3 times the size of the other two. At first my male cat (about 1 yr old) enjoys the play, but it ends up progressing into the maine coon playing too hard and then the other cat just hisses and growls and tries to get away. Sometimes when he is trying to get away, the maine coon thinks of it as play and chases him down, which leads to more squalling. The maine coon is extremely playful and is like that with cats and people alike - I have to be careful when i pet him or pick him up because if he is in a playful mood he will attack my arm with all fours before I can realize what's happening and pull it away. I know he's just being playful because there are no signs of aggression. I think he just doesn't realize how big he is. My female won't deal with him at all - if he gets too close she starts growling. Yesterday he tried to groom her and it started a fight. In the past week she has even had food aggression with both of the animals, something she has never done before. She also won't let the maine coon use the litter box sometimes. I have 3 separate food bowls and two litter boxes, but she will go to whichever food bowl the maine coon is at and growl out him. He is just a big baby and always lets her have her way. It makes me feel bad. She will also follow him to the litterbox and growl at him so he leaves. This only happens sometimes, not all the time. I have tried using a waterbottle and I've tried the "time out" approach too. (Put the offender in a boring room) I really don't know what else to do. I don't want to punish the maine coon because I don't think he thinks he is doing anything wrong. He has never showed aggression since we got him so I'm sure that he is just a big playful baby. I really want to keep the maine coon - besides these behaviour issues and conflict he is a delight to have.
I don't know how you introduced your cats to each other but there is a process which is designed to help the cats build confidence and trust in each other without the fear of aggression etc. It may still be a good idea to go throuigh this process with your cats for a week of so, to give them time to relax with each other. it does take some time and patience but is worth it in the end. it would involve keeping the maine coon in one room for the week with visits from the other cats while he is in a cage and then the other way round.
here is the process
As for how to modify his play, the answer is you can't.
Your other cats will do this , i.e it is important that they growl and hiss at easch other, thisd is normal behavior which is teaching him lessons.
as for his behavior towards you , you need to carry out the negative / positive response form of dicipline this will help him learn when his play is too rough with you. Agian I have a page which covers this process
I used to have a maine coon cat and yes they are big, but they are known as the gentle giants. he just needs some time and lessons from life (and the other cats).
best wishes kate