Expert: Jessica - 12/30/2009

Question
Hi Jessica,

I recently purchased my parents two pedigree siamese kittens that are three months old. So far the kittens have been with us for two weeks. My parents have owned a siamese blue point previously for 15 glorious years.

One of the kittens which is a seal point male has taken to us with gusto. He loves to get on everyone's knee, purrs madly, and loves to play. He never hides and we have gradually introduced him to all rooms in the house. The lilac point male is a different story. At first he hid under the bed in the room we intially kept them in. He will now very cautiously come out from under the bed but he seems to fear people greatly. Occassionally we can give him a pat when feeding them but he never purrs and generally he returns to under the bed. The other dy he jumped up on the bed and stayed breifly until I moved. Occasionally you also get a hiss from him when you bring food into the room.

We never force handle him and have tried to be patient, but in essence I am starting to become quite concerned that he is not going to take to us. It is a worry because my parents live in the country and the cats will have to travel with them to a small apartment in the city on average once a month. I am worried that we will not be able to handle the lilac point when we need to do things such as put them in the travel cage, and that he is not going be a people friendly cat. It is so strange given the other little one is so social!

Anyway sorry to ramble but in your opinion do we have a problem here? Is there any way we can encourage him to like us? I spoke to the breeder and she just says be patient and to keep him confined in a quiet place - but we have done this for two weeks now and in a couple of weeks my parents will have to take them to the city apartment for a week. We fear the lilac is going to be a problem!

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. We are close to asking the breeder if she will have him back as a last resort if he will not socialise.....

Thanks for any help

Paul  

Answer
Hi Paul.  Some Siamese are timid going to a new home, and I believe in giving them some space to adjust, for a few days.  When the kitten is still hiding a week later, it becomes time to force contact with the baby.  While it seems cruel to us, and the kitten may appear traumatized at first, physical contact is the only way to truly socialize a cat.  The younger you begin the physical contact the better, and unfortunately, since this one isn't going to pursue physical contact on his own, you have to forcibly initiate it.

What I recommend is that you hold the kitten and feed him some stage one chicken baby food (for humans) in a saucer on your lap.  Boiled chicken breast is also a great treat to get him to approach you on his own, once you start making a little progress.  Food is truly the most powerful tool you have in earning the kitten’s trust, and chicken is lean protein that kittens can use anyway.  However, be sure everyone takes a turn with feeding him the treats, as he is less likely to develop a relationship with those who don’t feed him.

Try also to hold the seal point in your lap while holding the lilac point.  The cuddles and purrs of the seal point will help relax him, and friendly cats make excellent teachers for nervous ones.

If the lilac point struggles when you try to hold him, see if scruffing him will help at first.  This means to grasp the loose skin on the back of his neck.  Not much force is needed – just a gentle hold, and it will trigger a reflex to go limp.  If scruffing is not enough, try wrapping the kitten tightly in a towel, except for his head, to avoid being scratched. Once he is settled in your lap, the worst of it is generally over, especially if you can get him to bury his face in the crook of your arm.  

Relaxation can also be encouraged by dimming the lights and playing gentle music, so you may want to sit in a room with a soft lamp and play some classical music when it comes time for visits.  Try to have structured visits like this for at least 15 minutes 4 times a day.  The more frequently you have contact, the more quickly he will socialize.

Do keep him in a small room until he’s well socialized.  I even recommend keeping kittens in dog crates with their food, water, toys and a litter box if the babies wedge themselves under furniture to become inaccessible.  

It is possible, and even probably, that he will never be an outgoing cat when it comes to strangers.  He may not be a great lap cat even with the family members.  But I think you should see a lot of progress as long as you start having intense contact with him in the immediate future.  Remember that the older he gets, the more difficult it will be to socialize him, so starting now, despite his protests, is the best idea.

Good luck!

Jessica