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My neighbour's cat has been visiting me a lot - almost living at mine, yet eating mostly at home. I still want her to come in, particularly at night, because she is old (12-14yrs) and her owners throw her out at night. She was in a right state when I first started letting her in, with knotted fur and a limp from arthritis.

The trouble is, I've just got a new cat - male, 6yrs old from a rescue centre. He is HUGE and she (the old cat) is frightened of him.

I started off with the new cat in a separate room and the old cat didn't seem to notice much. However, I must have introduced them too fast, because the old cat still hisses while running for the door.

The new cat either turns his back, or just sits there looking at her. Sometimes he sits between her and the door, in which case, she has little hissing phases, but stays a lot longer. He always seems disappointed when she runs away. He never hisses back. He's a big softy and he's even scared of the outside.

The new cat currently has the run of the house in the daytime, while the old cat is getting the run of the house at night, though most of the time, she is now too frightened to come in. I have to lure her in with treats and she doesn't stay that long.

I've tried all sorts of combinations. I've tried feeding them together, but she's too scared to eat. It has been three weeks now and I'm not sure what to do. She's breaking my heart, I love her. Can you help me please?

(They are both long haired, possibly maine coon/siberian cross)

Thank you.

well this is tricky because she is not your cat and the best way to introduce cats is with a very time consuming and supervised method described here on my web page

The process allows the cats to have contact in a safe controlled environment which gives them time to build there confidence in each other. I don't know if you will be able to do this or not due to the different times they are both around. perhaps just a 30 minute session each evening with no other contact.

Hope they are happier with each other soon

best wishes Kate


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Kate Tilmouth


I can answer most day to day cat problems encountered by owners. I have a good understanding of cat behaviour and problems which may arise from changes to their daily routine. I can advise on cat training including litter training and general day to day cat care issues. I am not a vet and therefore cannot answer medical questions.


I run my own cat website at and have been a dedicated cat owner for over 20 years. I have encountered many different cat problems and situations and feel that i have a good understanding of cats and cat ownership.

I am a platinum member of Ezinearticles where i write mainly cat related articles.

Educated to High School level and have since worked for many years in a customer support based environment, gaining vocational qualifications.

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