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Question
Hello Norman. My name is Danielle. I had a three year old cat called Toby. Not the friday just gone but the friday before he was run over and died. My vet said there wasn't a scratch on him. She said it was probably an internal injury that was the reason he died. Normally I am alot happier the week after a person or pet dies but in the case of Toby I am not happy at all. I now have a puppy called Chance but Toby didn't deserve that. I feel it's my fault Toby died. I know death is a part of life but I'm not coping well without Toby and I just need a bit of reasurence. I tried getting help to deal with the emotions but that hasn't helped, if anything it has made me feel worse. Thank you so much.
Danielle.
Danielle,
I am sorry for your loss of Toby. I know there is nothing I can say to make you feel better. I do know what it is like to lose a treasured pet and the grief felt after wards. The grief will pass.
Do not look at Chance as a replacement for Toby but a pet in his own right.
As to fault, there is no benefit to assigning guilt or fault for Toby's death. It is just one of those things that happens in life.
I know you will feel better in time.
Sad regards... Norm.
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Answers by Expert:
Norman Auspitz
Expertise
I can answer most non-veterinary questions about cats. My particular expertise is pedigree cats, breeding and showing. However, I am versed in feline behavior, cat breeds and their characteristics, general feline husbandry, and the like.
Experience
I judged for the Canadian Cat Association from 1975 until 1982. I am currently an approved allbreed judge for the Cat Fanciers'' Association (the world''s largets cat registry), and have been judging for them since 1991. I have been breeding pedigreed cats since 1971 and have been exhibiting pedigreed cats in shows since 1970. I obtained my first pedigreed cat in 1970 and have never looked back. In 1971, I obtained my first Abyssinian which has become my primary breed. In addition, I have bred Manx and Persians. Currently, besides the Abyssinians, I am also breeding Maine Coons.
Organizations
Cat Fanciers'' Association, inc. (CFA) and the Manx, Maine Coon, and Abyssinian breed councils. I am currently Abyssinian breed council secretary.
Publications
Cat Fancy Magazine, The Abyssinian Chapter in The Cat Fanciers'' Association Complete Cat Book, and Articles for various editions of The Cat Fanciers'' Association Yearbook
Education/Credentials
I received a B.S. from Drexel University in 1968, a M.Math from University of Waterloo, in 1970, a Ph.D. from University of Waterloo in 1975, and a MBA from McMaster University in 1980. I received my approved allbreed judging status in the Cat Fanciers'' Association in 1999.
Awards and Honors
We have produced a number of Cat Fanciers'' Association (CFA) National winning Abyssinian and Maine Coons. We have produced a number of Abyssinian and Maine Coon Distinguished Merit females (an award for a top producing cat), including the first Distinguished Merit Abyssinian in the red (sorrel) color. I am the CFA Abyssinian breed council secretary and belong and/or hold office in a number of cat clubs. I am also a member of the CFA Judges Association.
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