Expert: Ali - 3/17/2010

Question
Bisto was 18 years old when I had him euthanased almost two weeks ago now.  He had a stroke and could not eat any longer, walking in circles and along walls to find his way.

Angus is 17 year old now, still healthy.

Bisto was buried under a tree in the front of our garden.  Angus did not witness this.  

Every morning (that I've been outside), Angus walks to the area where Bisto is buried and howls.  Is he grieving?  

Kind Regards

Answer
Eone,

I'm so sorry to hear about the recent loss of Bisto, it's never easy to say goodbye to a much loved companion. It has been my experience that cats have the same response to the loss of a close friend or companion (regardless of the species of that companion) and they will grieve their loss in a variety of ways. There's really not much that can be done to help a cat get over the loss of someone s/he loves, just like people cats need time and a supportive environment to go through the grief process. At this point all you can really do is keep a close eye on Angus to ensure that he's not showing any signs of illness or serious distress and offer him plenty of cuddles and special attention when he seems able to accept it. Since I know how difficult it is to say goodbye to an old friend I've taken the liberty of including a few pieces of writing that I've found helpful during times when I've grieved the loss of much loved pets of my own, I hope they offer you some comfort.

The Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Fragile Circle


"We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached. Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way. We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan."

Irving Townsend

May your whiskers be ruffled by only pleasant breezes,
May your bowls be filled with tuna and sweet cream,
May your dreams be blessed with legions of mice,
And most of all,
May you forever purr in peace.
Amen


Please feel free to contact me again for any cat related questions or concerns you might have. You may also need an understanding person to listen during the grieving process and I'm more than willing to offer that for you if you need someone to listen without judgement. I'll keep you and Angus in my thoughts and prayers.