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Cats/Siamese (repetative) aggressive behavior towards new cat in house

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Expert: - 3/14/2010


Question

X and Sting
I have a 6 yr old Seal Point Siamese, (Sting) & a 10 yr old Blue Birman, (Xcalibur - X for short). X is the Alpha in the house. They get along fine w/ a tussle here & there. X will on occasion 'dominate' Sting, & Sting backs down or runs away. A short time will go by & the next thing you see is the both of them curled up together - sometimes w/ X preening Sting. About 9 months ago I adopted a black farm cat (Reaper). Reaper is nearly 1 year old as of this letter. I went w/ several vet & vet tech. suggestions, as well as guidance from 2 adoption agencies re. how to slowly introduce them & the importance of keeping them apart - initially. I have exchanged scents, swapped between rooms, baby gates, trial intro's w/ safeguards in place, 3 months of Feliway / Comfortzone, & I now have a large kennel in the living room with Reaper's necessities in it. The kennel was my idea as I wanted to try something that would allow maximum protection for Reaper, while allowing maximum exposure of scents & smells between them. All the previous have been done at the advice / encouragement of professionals. Initially X & Sting did not care for Reaper at all. During trial intro's, they both only hissed, growled, & attacked Reaper during these brief intro's / or thru the baby gate. X has finally made the adjustment - again w/ the occasional tussle, but never anything serious like the previous encounters. Apparently the kennel approach worked w/ X. A sign of hope - finally! Sting, however, is proving to be impossible. It is infrequent that Sting & Reaper accidentally have an encounter w/ the other. It never goes well. I would say it seems to be getting worse over time. Once in a while I think it seems to get better, as I see Sting walk by the kennel, sniff & walk away - no hissing or growling, & no attacking Reaper. At these brief / infrequent moments I cannot help but ask, "who are you, and what have you done w/ Sting?!" However, it's not long before Sting takes 2 steps back & the aggressiveness is right back where it was before if not worse. Sting's behavior includes: Hissing, growling, pawing / clawing at him through the cage, tail getting puffed up & the spinal ridge hairs standing up, & all out attacking & biting him on the neck - when one happens to encounter the other. When those accidents occur, Reaper will fight back, as he is the one being attacked. I cannot say I have seen it in reverse. However, when Reaper is in his kennel he never hisses back or attacks Sting. He seems to take a more submissive role & lays down. He appears to simply want to play with him as he stretches his paw out and almost 'coo's' at Sting - regardless of how aggressive Sting gets. Initially I yelled at Sting when this occurred, until I was told this only enforces the aggressiveness, so I stopped a while ago. When the infrequent 'civility' does occur, I try to reward Sting & encourage the 'good behavior'. I have read that Siamese are demonstrative towards other cats- especially new additions to the household. That Siamese are loyal to their owners - which he most certainly is! He's my lap-cat & is extremely affectionate, when Reaper is no where around. I understand Sting continues to see Reaper as an 'invader' to his territory. I love all of my cats more than words can describe. I do not want to surrender any of them nor do I want to accept that it's impossible. However maybe it is??? I have been told that it's prob never gonna work. That I could be facing keeping them separate - forever - a divided household. I'm afraid what will happen now that I'm letting X & Reaper socialize while being forced to keep Sting locked up in a room during those times. The constant swapping out of cats between rooms use to be taxing, now its 2nd nature to me - & them. Some have suggested to just throw the 2 of them in a room together & let them fight it out. I will not do that, as I've seen what happens during the however infrequent, accidental encounters. I do not know where to turn for answers as I think I have gone above & beyond already. I've been told I'm a good 'daddy' & that my cats are lucky to have me. I'm the one who is lucky to have them! I have talked to many professionals, but something in me says to keep asking around & just maybe someone will have an idea that I have overlooked or not tried. Or...maybe it's simply going to take an inordinate amount of time & a lot more patience on my part? I hope you're that person who has some ideas I have not tried or overlooked! I appreciate any help / assistance you might have. Thank you! -Michael

Answer
Hi Michael.  I LOVE the Siamese breed.  They are amazing companions, exceedingly loyal, entertaining, brilliant and gorgeous.  And good or bad, many of them can be relentless, as well, whether it comes to cuddling, protecting, crying to get into the bedroom, or teasing the "new guy".  This is the one trait I find people grow frustrated with most.  The bad news is, I don’t know how to get rid of it.  The good news is, even my most stubborn Siamese have come to live harmoniously with cats they struggled with at first.  However, it has taken them a very long time to adjust in some cases.  In the case of two Siamese who happened to take a disliking to one another, we had to keep them mostly separated for over three years before they suddenly decided they’d be friends.  If you think you’re up for keeping the cats separated for the long-haul, and continuing to work on introducing them slowly, you may be rewarded the same way.  Siamese are extremely attached to their routines and are resistant to change, but when they finally accept that a newcomer is there to stay, things really settle down.

There needs to be a way to start desensitizing Sting to Reaper, by exposing them to one another for short periods.  However, they need to keep a good distance so that neither feels any real threat of danger.  If you could place Sting in a crate and Reaper in his kennel and allow them to see each other from a distance for a few short minutes a few times a day, this may work.  In my situation, we allowed the cats to see each other through a glass door, then graduated to 5-minute no-contact visits in the same room.  The cats will feel some discomfort with the situation, but it shouldn’t be so unbearable that they explode like they do now.  With time, they should tolerate more and more exposure to one another.  See if the cats will enjoy some special treats during their time in the same area.  This way, they will associate each other with something positive.

I like Feliway a lot and use the Comfort Zone diffusers in my own home.  You might also want to try some flower essences.  I like a line called Spirit Essences (www.spiritessences.com) because they were formulated by a widely respected holistic veterinarian and an animal behaviorist.  I think Sting and Reaper may both benefit.  Sting could certainly use the Bully Remedy and perhaps Peacemaker.  Reaper could use Peacemaker as well, and may get a boost from Self-Esteem.  You can get all three together in the Ultimate Peacemaker package.  You can give these by mouth or add them to water, but my cats aren’t crazy for the taste, so I recommend applying the remedies to the head.

At times, people choose to put aggressive cats on antidepressants.  Antidepressants help control anxiety, the root cause of many cases of aggression.  I don’t know your entire situation, so I can’t make a judgment call, but I think you should know this is an option available to you, and it might be one worth considering.  I feel this way because a.) you clearly WANT to keep all the cats, b.) when a problem is so severe that it is disrupting the household and causing questions to arise about the need to rehome a pet, a medication is not an unreasonable consideration, and c.) Siamese may be prone to anxiety.  Most cats need treatment only temporarily, for a few months.  You should discuss this with your veterinarian if you feel it may be right for your situation.  There are still vets here and there who shoot antidepressants down, but I've seen how valuable they can be in my own cats, so get a second opinion if you'd like to try them but your first vet isn't supportive.

I just want to be sure that all your kitties are neutered.  I don’t believe you mentioned that in your question, and that can be a huge part of the equation if any of the cats are intact toms.  Tomcats fight, so if any of them happen to be unneutered, schedule the surgery ASAP, and see if that puts the situation at ease at all.

Good luck with all!

Jessica  

Jessica

Expertise

The areas in which I have gained the most experience are cat health and feral cat management/rescue. I provide supportive care to chronically ill cats, hospice care to terminally ill cats and also am involved in trap-neuter-return efforts. My specialities lie in taming feral cats and in the allopathic treatment of cats with illnesses or special needs. I also have owned Siamese, Himalayans, Abyssinians, Russian Blues, Savannahs, Bengals, Peterbalds, Don Sphynx and Oriental Shorthairs and am well-versed in cat breeds as well as cat behavior and nutrition.

Experience

I have 15 years of extensive experience with cats ranging from breeding to medical care. My daily routine consists of caring for cats with diabetes, thyroid disease, kidney failure, feline leukemia, feline AIDS as well as feral cats. I have experience with liver patients, heart patients, feline infectious peritonitis, cancer, recovery from amputation and trauma, congenital deformities and most every disease in between. I have assisted cats giving birth and hand-nursed kittens who were neglected by their mother from 2 days old through weaning.

Education/Credentials
15 years' hands-on experience

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