Expert: Jessica - 11/4/2011

Question
Currently we have a 1 1/2yr old neutered male cat (tuxedo type)that is usually really easy going in nature.  I have two children 5 and 7yrs old and our existing cat is really great with them.  We decided to get a second cat to join our family and recently brought home a Siamese kitten.  We have had the kitten for one week.  We have a separate room for the new kitten with its own food and kitty litter.  After a few days we let the kitten meet our cat.  Our existing cat was curious but now is stalking and pouncing with neck biting.  My question is how long should it take for the cats to get along?  Is there anything that I should watch out for that would indicate that they won't ever get along?  Should I go back to no contact between cats for several more weeks?  We would like for the cats to get along but if it isn't going to work out I would rather the kitten get a chance at a new home while it is young.  Also I have a concern that if it doesn't work out the children may get caught in between fights.  Solutions/ideas are welcome, we will try anything to ensure we do this right and the cats can be friends!

Answer
Hi Sheila,

With limited information and without physically observing the behavior, to me, it sounds like your tuxedo cat is not really threatening the kitten but is probably engaging in some over-zealous play and maybe exhibiting some dominance behavior. If he is howling prior to his attacks, then this would suggest otherwise (and in that case, a longer separation with slower introduction is recommended). But if he is quiet during his approach and just seems to get too excited in the moment, I think he is just having a little trouble figuring out how to interact just yet.

Remember that playing is actually a form of practice for fighting, and it mimics the real thing. So stalking and pouncing and biting are all part of play. And, in fact, most every pair of buddies will have a bout of play that escalates into a tiff now and then. But because (I assume) there is a considerable size difference between the kitten and your tuxedo right now, you should separate the two when play gets too rough. If the kitten squeaks, break it up. If you feel uncomfortable watching the little one get rough-handled, break it up. Kittens are resilient, they are moldable, they are forgiving, and they bounce back quickly from a smack or bite that may sting a little. But you do want to ensure he doesn't suffer any real damage.

I would recommend that you continue to give them their separate time now and then, but let them work out their relationship. It doesn't sound to me like they are experiencing anything abnormal. It's common for single cats to be awkward at first and unsure about how to get along, but it becomes more natural as the two establish boundaries with each other. As the kitten gets older and more able to put the older cat in his place, your tuxedo will naturally curb his aggressive behaviors back. It sounds like he is only eager to make friends but a little cumbersome about doing it. I don't suspect you are going to have any lasting problems here, and I don't think any extensive intervention is needed. With just a little oversight, I think the two should work things out with a little time.

If you start to notice that the two are negatively vocalizing a lot - lots of hissing (a hiss here and there is normal "leave me alone right now" talk), screeching and howling - this is a sign things are going in the wrong direction. Go back to a complete separation for a couple of weeks and try to reintroduce slowly, using food as a positive reinforcement. Feed them special meals together so that they associate this with one another. If that reintroduction still doesn't work, you may want to consider placement of the kitten. But as long as you aren't seeing this sign of heightened annoyance with one another, I wouldn't see any indication that they aren't getting along.

Best wishes!

Jessica