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Hi.I wrote you back in Novemember. I doubt if you remember but I have 2 cats. Jenny and Carrie. Jenny was always trying to fight Carrie and you told me to give them time to work it out. Well, its been some 5 months and things havent' changed yet. They are both spayed, about 5 yrs old.
Carrie growls becuase she's afraid of what Jenny will do and Jenny sees the growling as an ivitation to fight. I've tried feliway and that didn't work. I've tried putting Jenny in her carrier when she fights and that only helps for the rest of the day. I have to keep showing her that carrier to "remind" her.
So how can I make them stop? Is there a way to teach Carrie to 'stand up' to Jenny. Then I know things Jenny would stop being such a bully.
Would one of those Thundershirts help either of them? And me in the process? I don't care if they ever like each other, if they could just learn to tolerate each others presence, I'd be happy.


Yes, I do remember!

Unfortunately, cats are the only ones who know their rules of inter-relationships.  Although you may not be happy with the outcome, this is how they have decided to inter-relate to each other.  I would leave them be and ignore the tiffs.  It may sound like World War III and seem terribly gruesome, bit, usually know one really gets hurt, unless someone really does draw blood.

All human intervention is counter productive and tends to make things worse, so I would tend to do absolutely nothing when they start these tiffs. Cats do not think like we do, so it is a mistake to attribute human motives and emotions to things cats do.

In short, there is nothing you can do to change their relationship, nor is there anything you should do.

Best regards... Norm.


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Norman Auspitz


I can answer most non-veterinary questions about cats. My particular expertise is pedigree cats, breeding and showing. However, I am versed in feline behavior, cat breeds and their characteristics, general feline husbandry, and the like.


I judged for the Canadian Cat Association from 1975 until 1982. I am currently an approved allbreed judge for the Cat Fanciers'' Association (the world''s largets cat registry), and have been judging for them since 1991. I have been breeding pedigreed cats since 1971 and have been exhibiting pedigreed cats in shows since 1970. I obtained my first pedigreed cat in 1970 and have never looked back. In 1971, I obtained my first Abyssinian which has become my primary breed. In addition, I have bred Manx and Persians. Currently, besides the Abyssinians, I am also breeding Maine Coons.

Cat Fanciers'' Association, inc. (CFA) and the Manx, Maine Coon, and Abyssinian breed councils. I am currently Abyssinian breed council secretary.

Cat Fancy Magazine, The Abyssinian Chapter in The Cat Fanciers'' Association Complete Cat Book, and Articles for various editions of The Cat Fanciers'' Association Yearbook

I received a B.S. from Drexel University in 1968, a M.Math from University of Waterloo, in 1970, a Ph.D. from University of Waterloo in 1975, and a MBA from McMaster University in 1980. I received my approved allbreed judging status in the Cat Fanciers'' Association in 1999.

Awards and Honors
We have produced a number of Cat Fanciers'' Association (CFA) National winning Abyssinian and Maine Coons. We have produced a number of Abyssinian and Maine Coon Distinguished Merit females (an award for a top producing cat), including the first Distinguished Merit Abyssinian in the red (sorrel) color. I am the CFA Abyssinian breed council secretary and belong and/or hold office in a number of cat clubs. I am also a member of the CFA Judges Association.

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