Expert: Karen Craft - 8/30/2007

Question
We got 2 Bengal kittens at 8wks old, a male and female.  The female started sucking on the male's private (like a mother's nipple) and the male started sucking on the fur on his stomach.  They both go into a purr frenzy.  We have tried bitter & H2O spray, discipline, etc to get them to quit.  Now they are 6mo old and will be neutered/spayed next week.  Will that help?  What would you recommend?  Also, they are not bonding to us...it is more like they tolerate us.  We have tried separating them and loving and playing with them individually.  They will play, but don't want to be held or cuddled.

Answer
Hi Cindy,

It's very hard to break kittens of those habits. Having them neutered will help. And as they get older this will lessen. The male when he gets neutered won't tolerate the sucking right afterwards. It will be painful. He most likely will swat her a few times until she stops. Same for the male to her.

Now as for the bonding. Cats will get closer to you after they are neutered. But and this is a big but, they still may not like cuddling. I have one cat here who as a kitten was a wild and crazy kitten. She calmed down to this loving cat who sleeps on my lap while I watch TV. But I'm damned if she will let me pick her up. You learn to live with them. The one thing that will help is to find what they love as a treat. Mine loved evaporated milk. Use whatever it is to get them to really come to you. You can then try giving them extra love with the treats. Deli chicken is good. I have another cat that just adores BilJac liver treats. And another will do back flips for American cheese. Find the secret treat and it will work wonders with your two.

One other thing you can do if they go into their love fest is try to distract them with play. Get a laser pointer. Most cats love to chase the red dot. Or get furry mice, or anything you can use to distract them from themselves. Part of the reason they do what they do is boredom. Give them something to do. I hope this helped a little. Good luck.

Ciao, Karen