Celibacy/Abstinence/Test or Fate?


Hello Sir,

I am a 59-year old male with just under 9 months unbroken brahmacharya. Recently I spent part of a day with a female acquaintance. We had dinner at her house and then went to a movie. Following the movie, we had dessert at her house. There was no romantic activity, but I admit I was very tempted. Both the woman and I have no children and have never been married. This woman has a very similar appearance and personality to my sister-in-law (my brother's wife). She also has the exact same somewhat unusual occupation as my sister-in-law.

This leads to my question. Is this fate or a test from the Divine? Many aspects of the situation suggest I am fated to be involved with this woman as my late life partner. On the other hand, I greatly value and recognize the tremendous benefits of brahmacharya and don't want to lose it. At this stage of my brahmacharya, I know I will eventually act on my desire if I continue to spend time alone with this woman.  

Any observations  will be greatly appreciated. Thank-you. R.

Involvement with the opposite sex outside the precincts of marriage for recreation as man/woman ends in suffering. The purpose of cupid is to lead to marriage, not more. Hence the association should be looked forward to if marriage (carried out at the earliest) is the genuine objective from both sides, after taking all other factors into consideration.

ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)


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Questions concerning the practice of 'Brahmacharya' to know the self, & the means required are dealt with here.


The term 'Yoga' is a derivative of the Samskruth verb 'Yuj' which refers to union. 'Yoga', also called 'Brahma vidy‚' is the eternal dissolution of the individual 'Aham' (Ego) into the Atman (self) for 'Mukti' (liberation). Mere indulgence in '¬sana' or physical postures is not Yoga. ¬sana is only one limb or 'Anga' of Yoga. The eight limbs viz. Yama, Niyama, ¬sana, Pr‚n‚y‚ma, Praty‚h‚ra, Dh‚rana, Dhy‚na and Sam‚dhi are the means to Yoga. Brahmacharya or spiritually based continence is one of the important components of 'Yama'. 'Brahmacharya':- "Brahmani charyathey ithi" - "To surrender one's Ego and go with the will of the Almighty."


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