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Celibacy/Abstinence/Is marriage necessary?


Namaste sir,

From gods grace and your invaluable guidance I am progressing on the path of celibacy.

It sometime happens that I feel very strong attraction for materialistic pleasure and sometimes I feel disgusted by these same things. Most of time I am indifferent to these things.I am learning to be at peace all the time.

My question is do we need to marry compulsorily? The marriage will happen if god wills or if its in one's destiny but what if it is not? In my case I have no will left at all for marriage.The very idea makes me crawl in my skin,I feel disgusted. It all happened naturally not forcefully after I started practicing celibacy.I want know if is it right to remain unmarried following strict celibacy.Please elaborate in detail sir because you have provided very detailed answers to past questions and it helped me to grasp the knowledge and understand idea perfectly.

Thank you sir.

1. In the case of some Jiva-s (individuals), marriage is necessary for further progress in the evolutionary ladder, while the same is not necessary as regards some others.

2. Does it matter whether one married in the incident which occurred in a dream? It was after all a dream with dream characters. The waking state is another dream in the life of the Ego, with the world as its background. The real Yogi does not get affected by the incidents which occur or fail to occur in this extended dream, but ever holds on to the self.

3. The Great Lord decides who should marry or not, as HE does all other things. Hence one should relax and accept destiny as it comes, not affected by marriage or lack of it, all the time intent on spiritual practice to hold on to the self.

The true Yogi neither hates events concerning the world (say marriage), nor loves them, for they are a part of the dream which the Ego experiences. He does his Dharma (duty) & views the resulting happenings & non-happenings with a detached and light perspective, as though watching the scenes in a movie, accepting destiny, whether pleasant or unpleasant, with an equal perspective.

The true self which is formless has no birth, no marriage and no death, for all these concern the coverings called the body & the Ego. So why then worry about such events? HE who created this body with its Ego will take care of them as HE always has (with marriage or without it), making them go through that which is required to work out karma. Let HIM do so.

The Lord takes as much responsibility and weight as one transfers to HIM. Hence the wise transfer all their responsibilities on to the Lord who takes it all. Such complete transfer becomes possible only when one transcends the Ego which has been assuming doership. Hence it suffices if one applies effort to overcome the Ego. Why should we plan for things (body & Ego) which we are not?  We hold on to our self which is a part of the Great Lord and merge ourselves into it, ever free, ever in peace, happy as a child. That is Yoga and that is what HE wills.

ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)  


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Questions concerning the practice of 'Brahmacharya' to know the self, & the means required are dealt with here.


The term 'Yoga' is a derivative of the Samskruth verb 'Yuj' which refers to union. 'Yoga', also called 'Brahma vidy‚' is the eternal dissolution of the individual 'Aham' (Ego) into the Atman (self) for 'Mukti' (liberation). Mere indulgence in '¬sana' or physical postures is not Yoga. ¬sana is only one limb or 'Anga' of Yoga. The eight limbs viz. Yama, Niyama, ¬sana, Pr‚n‚y‚ma, Praty‚h‚ra, Dh‚rana, Dhy‚na and Sam‚dhi are the means to Yoga. Brahmacharya or spiritually based continence is one of the important components of 'Yama'. 'Brahmacharya':- "Brahmani charyathey ithi" - "To surrender one's Ego and go with the will of the Almighty."

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