Celibacy/Abstinence/Workplace jealousy


Greetings Sir,   

I am a 59-year old man with just over a year unbroken brahmacharya. At my job, I supervise a young woman. We work closely together and get along very well. I am quite attracted to her, but have always conducted myself appropriately and professionally in our interactions. This woman is very affectionate with another man at the office. She hugs him often and has told me she is attracted to him.

This other man is very popular with many women at work. He acts so happy to see them and often massages their shoulders and puts his arm around them. Sometimes he kisses my work partner on the head. He is married to a woman who also works for the same company. I do not get the feeling he is looking for sexual relationships.

I have become painfully jealous and hurt over my work partnerís interactions with this man. I do my best to hide it and not let it affect my behavior. Here are my questions:

1) I am considering leaving this job for other reasons, is it best for my spiritual development to stay and work through these feelings through spiritual practices and brahmacharya?

3) What would you say about the behavior of this other man? He seems so happy in his interactions with women. I must admit, I have always had an uncomfortable feeling about him. I feel a deep distrust as if there is a dark side to him that others donít seem to see. Thank-you.

1. That entity which feels the jealousy is not the real you. It is the Ego. One wishing Enlightenment should work at annihilating the Ego and get free of the same. That is Brahmacharya.

2. What others do is not our concern. The only thing on our minds is to know the self and reside in the self, as the self, following which all queries get answered.

ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)  


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Questions concerning the practice of 'Brahmacharya' to know the self, & the means required are dealt with here.


The term 'Yoga' is a derivative of the Samskruth verb 'Yuj' which refers to union. 'Yoga', also called 'Brahma vidy‚' is the eternal dissolution of the individual 'Aham' (Ego) into the Atman (self) for 'Mukti' (liberation). Mere indulgence in '¬sana' or physical postures is not Yoga. ¬sana is only one limb or 'Anga' of Yoga. The eight limbs viz. Yama, Niyama, ¬sana, Pr‚n‚y‚ma, Praty‚h‚ra, Dh‚rana, Dhy‚na and Sam‚dhi are the means to Yoga. Brahmacharya or spiritually based continence is one of the important components of 'Yama'. 'Brahmacharya':- "Brahmani charyathey ithi" - "To surrender one's Ego and go with the will of the Almighty."

Bachelors degree in Engineering.

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