Celibacy/Abstinence/Will times change
After lot of struggle I had encountered favourable conditions at my workplace. But very soon complacency set in and I went into the quagmire of breaking into induced carnal pleasure. Somehow the elation of having won over my hardships put me into this stage of pleasure seeking. Somehow there was a constant call from the conscience that what I was doing was wrong for further advancement but I fell in the whirlpool. Then I felt immense pain physically. Now I have realised my mistakes and I am worried if the good situation I have managed to earn will fade away.
Why does it happen that when the times are good for me I enter into state of extreme elation which I can't control and complacency sets in though these moments of success and happiness after very few in my life.
Only suggest what's wrong with me
1. It is the nature of the Ego, the product of ignorance, to experience elation at pleasure and sorrow at pain. Till one does not overcome identification with the Ego, this situation of extremes, which is a sign of imbalance exists.
2. The ignorant Ego, constantly seeking external pleasure (not having realized that the greatest bliss is within) flies at accomplishment and falls at failure. It is ever dissatisfied, devoid of equilibrium and the cause of unrest. Hence the wise Yogi constantly strives to get rid of it, so as to reside in the self, as the self.
The Yogi of wisdom, in equilibrium, who resides in the self, is neither elated by happiness nor pained by sorrow. Knowing both these to be unsubstantial, impermanent, fleeting and the effect of Maya, he watches as a mere spectator, completely detached from both, only holding on to the self. That is Yoga, as Lord Krishna tells Dhananjaya (Arjuna) in the Bhagavad Gita:
योगस्थः कुरु कर्माणि साङ्गं त्यक्त्वा धनञ्जय |
सिधयसिद्धयोः समोभूत्वा समत्वम्योगमुच्यते ||
"Forsaking attachment to your actions (or their fruits), indulge in Yoga O Dhananjaya"|
Accepting success and failure with equality, this evenness of mind is called YOGA || - Chap II/48 - The Bhagavad gita
Hence one should turn a blind eye to happenings and non-happenings of this dream world, do one's duty and remain steadfast in Sadhana to realize the self alone. That is the path taken by the wise seekers of liberation.
ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)