Celibacy/Abstinence/Honesty of Roles
I sincerely appreciate your prior answers to my questions on Swamis Vivekananda, Sivananda, and Ramana Maharishi. I now understand that while these individuals may have played certain roles in society for various reasons, they were ultimately engrossed in the self.
Upon further contemplation, a few more questions arose.
1) I considered the roles I play-brother, student, teacher, scientist, etc. In each role that I play, I color my physical body and mind with certain attributes (for example I must be confident in my mental math ability to be a successful scientist). Therefore, is it safe to say that identification with the ego is unavoidable if one is to live and interact on this planet? If this is not the correct approach, kindly advise me; in that case, I am encountering much difficulty when trying to understand how I can remain confident in the abilities of this physical body and mind yet still not identify with the ego.
2) Over the last few weeks, my meditation practices have been growing more and more restless. In fact, I am ashamed to admit that one some days I have completely failed to perform it. I will be taking on a significant challenge and I seem to constantly forgot Lord Krishna's insistence that one must focus simply on the action but not the fruits of the action. I feel the energy gains previously made stagnating in lower chakras and transmuting into tamas and not sattva.
3) In terms of considering this world as the Lord's playground "leela vibhootam", I do not see how the path of a brahmachari is different from, for instance, a degenerate thief. Why must one then follow the Dharmic path? Or is it possible for a thief to follow Dharma by stealing, because the proper role of a thief is to steal! Why should the role of a brahmachari be considered in a higher light than other roles? If not, what distinguishes the virtuous and self-restrained (yogis) from the corrupt and degenerate? Different evolutionary stage?
I appreciate your guidance. Upon following this practice, I have unfortunately lost all motivation and enthusiasm. I treat my passions as merely roles that must be played accurately, and my overall sense of stability and progress is diminished and I feel immense lack of productivity.
1. A role cannot be played without the Ego. However, the difference between the common man and the realized soul is that the common man functions from his own individual Ego, takes it to be real (and therefore gets affected by the outcome of his actions & the world), while the realized soul temporarily associates with the 'Ego of the role' being played, taking it lightly, as an actor plays a role (never getting personally affected by his acting).
While the common man considers himself as the Ego & the body, at the individual level, the realized soul does not associate with any of these and can act as many role's as needed, by creating new, temporary Ego's for the particular role, with ease. There is no individual identification with any of the created Ego-s, beyond the purview of the act. There is never a personal identification with any of these at all. Remaining neutral, free from desire, he functions as the medium of expression of God's will (there being no individual will).
Therefore, the actions of the Enlightened sage are the actions of God.
When the Yogi strives for this path and functions accordingly, with regular Sadhana to dissolve past Samskara-s, he gradually comes closer to his self, following which it becomes easier to function from temporary Ego's without any personal identification.
2. Undulations in Sadhana occur to all aspirants. One has to persevere, despite obstacles, without giving in and without giving up. Then, the practice eventually gets established, after a long time.
3. The role of the Brahmachari, in quest of the self, is the role which gradually dissolves unwanted karma, prevents the addition of new, unnecessary karma, eventually freeing the Jiva from all further role's for ever (via liberation), granting eternal release from suffering. Other roles do not bestow knowledge of the self, but only entangle the Jiva in further unwanted karma, thereby binding it to the ocean of pain called 'Samsara'. This is the vast sea of difference.
Lack of enthusiasm is a temporary phase of withdrawal of the individual Ego, which is subjected to motivation and demotivation. When the individual Ego is fully annihilated, the Yogi assumes the temporary 'Ego of the role', which is most enthusiastic in working as the medium of the Lord's Leela.
ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)