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Celibacy/Abstinence/Finding a marriage partner


Dear Dhananjay,
I want to thank you for your answers so far, I appreciate your advice very much and it helped me on numerous occasions. I practise chastity for a considerable time now and I see the benefits very clearly. I had one voluntary break many months ago and that made me feel so miserable afterwards (both mental and physical) that Iím determined never to repeat it again.
Iíve one last question. Sometimes I read in your posts that contact with women should be brief and that we should be on our guard because God will tests us in our resolve. But I also read that a brahmachari who doesnít plan to become a monk can marry and beget offspring; and thus only has procreational intercourse.
So, how can I tell the difference between a girl who is tempting to break my chastity and a girl who may become my future wife? How can I meet my future wife when I should avoid contact with women as much as possible?
I live in the west where men and women mix regularly in social life and in the work place.
Thank you for your help,

If one's Sadhana is right, with honest efforts towards Brahmacharya and surrender to God, a suitable soul will take the position of one's life partner, if so destined, at the designated time. It will be known when it happens, just as all other things. There need not be any worry.

ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)


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Questions concerning the practice of 'Brahmacharya' to know the self, & the means required are dealt with here.


The term 'Yoga' is a derivative of the Samskruth verb 'Yuj' which refers to union. 'Yoga', also called 'Brahma vidy‚' is the eternal dissolution of the individual 'Aham' (Ego) into the Atman (self) for 'Mukti' (liberation). Mere indulgence in '¬sana' or physical postures is not Yoga. ¬sana is only one limb or 'Anga' of Yoga. The eight limbs viz. Yama, Niyama, ¬sana, Pr‚n‚y‚ma, Praty‚h‚ra, Dh‚rana, Dhy‚na and Sam‚dhi are the means to Yoga. Brahmacharya or spiritually based continence is one of the important components of 'Yama'. 'Brahmacharya':- "Brahmani charyathey ithi" - "To surrender one's Ego and go with the will of the Almighty."


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