Expert: Don - 12/12/2008

Question
I have been in a relationship for 5 1/2 year with this guy on and off and we live together. I have caught him in lies with talking and being with other girls numerous times. We have one child together.  He now feels that he is done with all the bs and wants to be a family man and wants to marry me, he didn't get me a ring or anything he just says he will, come on its been 5 1/2 years why do I still have to wait. I don't even see marriage in my future anymore he killed that for me. I still feel deep down inside that I cannot trust him. I don't have the same feelings for him as I did long before. We have been through a lot together, but I just don't want to be with him like that. How can I end the relationship without jeopardizing everything. Should I think about the child? Oh and we don't get along that much we always argue everyday.

Answer
Arguing everyday is more harmful to a child then his parents just breaking up. If a child sees the two of you fighting all the time it can warp their feelings on relationships and possibly traumatize them. It could affect the child in future relationships. It could also teach the kid that fighting is what couples do and confuse the kid.

As far as leaving him just let him know what you let me know, that you don't trust the guy, you aren't in love with him anymore. Let him know you think you two should break up and then stand behind your decision. If you don't want to be with him you can just leave.