Expert: Melissa Durazo - 3/12/2008

Question

I met this guy on the internet. We were together for 7 months. Every time I tried to see him, he always had some excuse not to see me. I flew down there about 2 months ago because he told me to come. I never got to see him because when I was at the airport on his way to pick me up he supposedly got pulled over by the police and was arrested. I stayed down there for about a week and a half and I called all the jails down there, they said they did not have him. So I don’t believe that he went to jail also while I was down there I had gotten into a fight with his sisters baby daddy because he jumped on her which I have to go to court for next week down there. Two days later after I leave he magically appears out of nowhere!  Two or three days ago he said he was coming to see me. He pretend as if he was on the road close to me and he never showed up! I just can’t believe this! I never cheated on this guy; I was nothing but good to him! I paid money to fly down there, I helped him put a down payment on his car, I even sent his sister $60 hrs. for his mom to pay her loan right before he said he was coming  and he never showed up. I just wanted what was best for him because he isn’t as fortunate as I am. It’s just messed up to know that the whole time he was playing games he didn’t even want me! The last thing he said to me was that he was in _ (a city about an hour away from me )__ . I don’t understand why he would do that. I’m no where near ugly, I have a lot going for myself, I am a good woman, I just don’t understand!


Answer
Well, it looks as if the writing is clearly on the wall. And, you , for some reason, are refusing to see it. Sweetie, you don't need this man leading you on. You have more important things to take care of in your life than to wait for a guy who is never going to make himself accessible to you. And , don't you think you deserve much better?
And, the fact that you have helped his family is far and beyond anyone can do in this situation. Take care of your impending business with his sister and cut them ALL loose. You deserve better. And, you know this!!
I know that it is going to be hard for you. But, in the long run, this is going to be the best thing you can do for yourself. And, it will leave you open to finding someone who WILL appreciate you and love you for being the extraordinary woman that you are!
Good luck & keep me posted on your progress!
~ M