Expert: Don - 6/16/2008

Question
My fiance and I had known eachother for over 5 years, we had been together for only a month or so when he told his ex girlfriend that he wasn't sure if he still loved her, he also asked her to go over to hiss house at 2 in the morning, I found out by finding the txt message in his phone. Prior to that he had taken her back to his place for a night, lied to me about seeing and talking to her after he had told me he wouldn't do either anymore. I stayed and it has now been a year and a half but I am still so hurt and still cant get over it. I love him with all my heart but I find it so hard to trust him, what can i do?

Answer
Either get over it or break up with him. You must do one or the other because if you don't get over it you're going just end up breaking up with him anyway so you might as well do it now and save yourself some time and heartbreak.

If you can't trust him you'll never be able to have a happy and successful relationship with him. Since you don't trust him, what will happen is that every time he goes somewhere you'll start to wonder what he is doing and who he is doing it with, you'll start to drive yourself crazy with your worries and you'll start to accuse him of things even if he's not doing anything, which in turn will lead him to be resentful of you want force him to break up with you down the line.

So if you feel you really can't trust him and get past his betrayal then you should just break up with him now because it's going happen eventually anyway.

So you have to either learn to live with what he did and accept he won't do it again or end the relationship now.