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About Melissa Durazo
Expertise
I may have the answers that one is looking for to confront and deal with a cheating man or woman. I can answer questions concerning the physical and mental anguish that a cheating mate can cause. Questions on how to move on from this type of relationship. Or, questions on how to forgive and work on fulfilling a new start. I can also, help in recognizing the signs and lies of a cheater. as well, as how to catch one in the act.
Experience
I was in a 10 yr. relationship, in which the last 3 years of it was nothing but lies, cheating & abuse. I almost lost my job, my friends and family because I could not let go of this co-dependent relationship. I went through a life changing experience and I came out realizing that I was stronger than I thought I was. I learned that no one is responsible for my happiness and well being. I also learned, that I will make mistakes, I will fall down, but, in the end, it's how I face the problem that will get me through the day.......
Education/Credentials
The school of Life. Life is all the education I have ever needed.
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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Dating > How to Cheat On Your Partner/ Deal With Cheaters > Am I doomed to be a cheater?
Expert: Melissa Durazo - 9/5/2008
Question
QUESTION:
My husband and I have been married for a little under a year. We've been together for 2 years. In that time span, I've cheated on him with 4 different guys. In all cases, it was nothing more than sex. In a couple of the cases, I was drunk. First of all, I know being drunk isn't exactly a good excuse. And I know exactly why I cheated each time. It was because: 1. I was extremely curious about the man and 2. My husband isn't that great in bed, so I looked elsewhere for satisfaction. Now my question to you is, is there a way to permanently stop this horrible cycle? Or am I just doomed to be a cheater? I love my husband very much and I don't want him to suffer like that ever again. And yes, he found out about each occurrence.
ANSWER: The only thing I can recommend for you is to go to 1)Individual counseling & 2 ) Couples counseling.....
This is the only way you will be able to work on your issue and also heal the relationship with your husband.
You are recognizing that you have a problem. And, that is the first step to correcting your problem. Be aware that it is going to take plenty of strength to change your ways. But, a person can always change their actions for the better with a little bit of strength, self discipline and help....
Good luck....
Take care....
~ M
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: If we don't have insurance to cover counseling...is there any other way to deal with this issue?
Answer
If you could tell me what city and state you are in, I would glad to research some options for you. When I went through my counseling, they only charged me $45.00 for a 1 hr session once a week. But, that was over 4 years ago.....There is a big difference between a counselor and therapist - the counselor is there to advise you on what you should do in your situation, circumstances and behavior. They help you deal with the problem and help you solve it. A Therapist or Psychotherapist, is there to help with emotional and physical issues that happen when a person can no longer take their situation or behavior. They focus on the persons thought process and how they deal with things through behavior and actions. And, it's much more a long term treatment than counseling, which is short term.
I'll be glad to help you out in finding affordable counseling......
:)
Regards,
~ M
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