AboutMelissa Durazo Expertise I will not help you cheat, so please do not ask me how to. If you are having issues with a cheater or suspect your mate of cheating, then, I can help you deal with the issue.
I may have the answers on how to confront and deal with a cheating man or woman. I can answer questions concerning the physical and mental anguish that a cheating mate can cause. advise how to move on from this type of relationship. Or, advise on how to forgive and work on fulfilling a new start. I can also help in recognizing the signs and lies of a cheater. As well, as how to catch one in the act.
Experience I was in a 10 yr. relationship, in which the last 3 years of it was nothing but lies, cheating & emotional abuse. I almost lost my job, my friends and family because I could not let go of this co-dependent relationship. I went through a life changing experience and I came out realizing that I was stronger than I thought I was. I learned that no one is responsible for my happiness and well being. I also learned, that I will make mistakes, I will fall down, but, in the end, it's how I face the problem that will get me through the day.......
Education/Credentials The school of Life. Life is all the education I have ever needed.
Question My boyfrined cheats on me all the time. i catch him and he says he will stop, but then I found out a week later that he has done it again. i come home early one day(yes i live with him) and caught him in the act. He promised me that was the last time and we are now in couple counsling. now here is the kick, i found out that he is hiv postive. so far i have not tested postive. he knows he is postive yet still goes out and cheats. i love this man so much but i keep thinking that maybe we can work this out. is there something wrong with me. everytime he walks out the door i think he is going to cheat. his hiv status does not stop him from going out and cheating. I duno what to do. help
Answer At this point, sweetie...You come first. Your health comes first. And, you need to forget about making this work. If couples counseling hasn't worked to curb his cheating ways or the scare of having HIV hasn't scared him enough to stop cheating, he is a lost cause. And, by being with other women, he is not just putting at risk, he is putting their health at risk, too. That is selfish and irresponsible.
And, did you know that there are 34 states who have laws against not telling one's sex partner they are HIV positive? HIV doesn't show up over night, it could take months, even years....So, now, you are going to have to get tested every 6 months and you will have to tell your future sex partners, that you have had sex with an HIV infected person, so that they can take precautions to protect themselves, just in case you are infected.
You need to forget about this man. He has done irreparable damage to you. It is time to put yourself first. You need to get over trying to save a relationship that cannot be saved.
There is nothing wrong with you. You just need the confidence to make this stop and walk away.
You can be strong. It's time to make up your mind and take YOUR life back.....
I know you can do it. Surround yourself with friends and family who will love you and be there for you. People who will support your decision and be happy for you.....
Good luck and please take care of yourself.......
~ M
