Expert: Sam E - 3/30/2007

Question
My girlfriend of 6 months had kissed and cuddled with another guy last month while she was away on a trip for a week. I found out by a friend of hers what she had done, but not until we had all returned home from our trip. This happened while I was over-nighting it on the bus to go see her. She had asked her friend, the one who told me what had happened, while we were still there to lie to me for her about what she did because she really wanted to continue our relationship with me. Later, I learned from her aunt that she has promiscuous issues when she drinks. Secondly, when we got back my gf had told me she was pregnant and had a miscarriage but I later found out from her aunt that she could not get pregnant, i am not sure why a woman would say this mebbe for me to feel pity for her.  
Lately, she had really slowed down on her drinking and we are trying to work it out but I still have major trust issues with her, and I have a real hard time believing anything she says to me. Since we got together I was suspicious she was like this but I had hoped she wouldnt be with me.
Rich

Answer
It sounds like she is head tripper and a cheater. This is definitely someone you should stay away from. These type of relationships rarely last. I suggest you end it now but if you want to try again this is what I suggest.
Don’t play Magnum PI with her. Don’t tighten a leash, check her phones or emails or follow her around because that will not stop her form cheating. Love stops people from cheating so if she loves you she won't do it. Drinking does not make people cheat so don't buy into that either.  Just let her be herself and do what she wants, but if start to get a bad feeling than confront her with it. Talk it over. Trust can be built up but it takes time. It takes her not cheating again and you letting it go.
With time this will past and you will have trust in her again. If she happens to ever break that trust, than  you need to move on!
~Sam