Expert: Sam E - 10/21/2006

Question
My girlfriend of almost 6 years is finally pregnant! The problem is that she had unprotected sex with someone besides me. How can I forgive her, or should I forgive her?  Thanks so much ahead of time for any help.

Answer
I suggest you take a lot of time  away from her before you  jump right back into her arms. She broke your trust and that hurts, plus she put you at risk for STD's. Space away from her is what you need right now anyway. I suggest you seek counseling and after a while , if you decide to go back to her, seek couples counseling.
Is this baby yours? If she says it is, are you sure? If you are not certain, than I suggest the baby be tested when he/she is born.  
If this baby is yours, you both need to be healed from this pain before he/she is born. A baby needs a stable, calm environment and if you are not over the pain, the stress of the baby and the cheating may be too much.   
Now if this baby is not yours are you strong enough to father another mans child?  
Seeking help to sort this all out is the best you can do right now.  You need time to think and time to heal.
If you decide not to be with her but want to be in the child’s life, that is your right.  If she fights you, you may end up in court, but being in the child’s life is worth the battle.
Hope this helps. Write me anytime.
SAM