Expert: Anika Rynn - 9/10/2006

Question
My boyfriend & I have been together for 11 months. I care about him. I take care of his daughter, I help him with situations, take him out, and whenever he needs me I'm always there. I love his daughter and I care for him. He said I was nicest girl he met. He seemed happy. Then last week he stopped returning my phone calls which hurt me because I never had to look for him or call him multiple times. We've always been understanding and close and everybody knows this. So when I saw him he seemed distant like something was wrong he had his head down and couldn't even look at me. He said he went to a party, had a cup of tea, played a Playstation game, stood up, and fell. And all he can remember is that he woke up and the people at the party was looking at him. Someone looked at him like he did something wrong but he doesn't know what he did. I called his friend and his friend said he had something to drink, he was tipsy and hard, and he had a hicky on his neck. When his friend asked him what happened my boyfriend said he didn't know and his friend said he seemed alittle out of it. My boyfriend was told me when he finds out what happened I will at him as a bad person and will not want to be with him. I said it's ok you don't remember what happened so why does it matter. He said it does matter and he said I can call him or text message him if I want to but he won't pick up the phone. Whatever I have to say I have to text him but he won't call me back. I saw him two days ago and he won't talk to me I don't know what happened I'm confused and I want him. I called him and told I still like him but he won't call me back. I don't understand why would he want to loose a diamond (me). Why would someone not call but his friend said he feels bad and like he's a bad boyfriend for putting himself in that position. His friend said just be cool with him he'll come around and talk to me and I've tried calling him and asking his to call me back but he hasn't. I'm trying to be there but I don't want to look stupid in the process.

Answer
There really isn't much of a question here. I recommend just doing what his friend said and wait for him to come around (if he will). I think he feels guilty and it's probably hard for him to be intimate or close to you. If you would be willing to stay with him even if you found out he cheated, I recommend telling him that you don't know what happened but if worse came to worse and he did cheat on you; you'd be willing to work through it because you love him. With that you two can probably work things out with lots of communication ok? Anyways I hope things get better and work out for you ok? Best of Luck -Anika-