Expert: Don - 9/19/2007

Question
My gf and I got drunk the other night... we both open up and say more than we do when sober. Enter: confession time. She confesses to having sexual relations with her little brother. I asked her about it, she explained - both of us were pretty drunk - told me about how he's always so lonely and she wants him to be happy so she pleases him masturbates
him, gives him oral pleasure). I asked what he does with her, she said she just lets him do whatever he wants to her, she "just wants him to be happy".

I confronted her about this the next day. She was a little hung over so already wasn't in the best of moods. She denied it. I said that people open up and share more when drunk. She said I just have to trust that what she's saying right there (the next day) was true. I said how do I know if I should trust the drunk self (more likely to be honest) or the sober self (likely to deny it)? Her behavior, the whole time, was much like, "I'm busted" and the brother-sister secret was no longer a secret. She even told me - the previous night, when we were both drunk - that her brother and her sister have also had sexual relations but she (my gf) never asks or gets involved in it and she said she "just lets them do their own thing".

I told her, "ok I'll trust your 'sober' self."

Honestly though, I don't know if I should.

Likewise, I don't know what to do about the whole thing.

What do you think?

Thanks,
gabe

p.s.- Say she actually has done those things - maybe she feels shame, maybe she doesn't feel shame... maybe she is convinced it is not cheating because it is "after all" her own brother. Regardless of what she thinks, if she is doing it, how am I to tell which version of what she shared with me is true and what am I to do about it? Thank you!

Answer
I think the drunk story is the truth, no person makes up a story like that just because they are drunk. If she is having sex with her brother, I think that is pretty disgusting and if I was you, I would distance myself from that girl. Something is definitely wrong with her mentally if she'd do anything sexual with her own brother. She needs some help.