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How to Deal With Cheaters/Questions Answered by Expert Melissa Durazo
| Subject | Date Asked |
| Did that cheater truly love me, even for a moment? | 10/14/2009 |
| Q: I found out that my ex-bf has been two-timing me throughout the 3mths29days that we've been ... A: In all honesty. No, he did not truly love you. Nor, does he even love this other girl he is with. He ... | |
| cheated early on, now pregnant and not sure whether to confront him or not | 10/13/2009 |
| Q: I started seeing my partner in July of 2008. We have since moved in together and are expecting our ... A: From this point on, the only person you need to start worrying about is your soon to be born child. ... | |
| Betrayed | 10/11/2009 |
| Q: I am 23 and I have been in love with a girl for almost seven years.she has been everything for me.my ... A: First off, although it feels as if you are going to die....The reality is, you will over come this ... | |
| cheating boyfriend | 10/6/2009 |
| Q: ive bin wit my boyfriend 4 almst 2 years and hes bin cheating since i was pregnant,when i confronted ... A: This is going to sound harsh. But, it's straight to the point. If he hasn't stopped cheating on you ... | |
| will he change? | 7/3/2009 |
| Q: So.. Im a very understanding and forgiving person, and Ive been in a serious relationship (my first) ... A: Well, I do not believe that ultimatums work.....You can not force someone who isn't willing to ... | |
| Should I work it out with son's father? | 7/3/2009 |
| Q: My son's father and I have been involved on and off for the past 2 1/2 yrs. The first 1-2 months, ... A: This email is quite long and a bit complicated....But, I can see you are frustrated and concerned ... | |
| Okay so now what | 5/11/2009 |
| Q: I'm 20 years into a marriage that was a bad choice to begin with. Over the course of the marriage ... A: You are welcome.... Good luck & if your relationship does comes to an end...I hope you both realize ... | |
| I have no idea where to go from here? | 5/10/2009 |
| Q: I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 30 years old. We've been dating for 2 years. It's been quite a rough 2 ... A: Your first serious relationship is usually the hardest to let go.... You are too young to start off ... | |
| 3 years and an X prob? | 5/8/2009 |
| Q: My boyfriend (33) and I (26) have been together for about 3 years. He is a very faithful guy never ... A: Ok, now, it all makes sense to me......Thank you for giving me insight into your situation. He is ... | |
| Okay so now what | 5/7/2009 |
| Q: I'm 20 years into a marriage that was a bad choice to begin with. Over the course of the marriage ... A: First of all, in what way has your marriage been a bad choice to begin with? And, it's taken you 20 ... | |
| 3 years and an X prob? | 5/6/2009 |
| Q: My boyfriend (33) and I (26) have been together for about 3 years. He is a very faithful guy never ... A: After reading your email.....I am going to have to agree that he hasn't really given you a reason to ... | |
| i dont know what i want anymore | 5/4/2009 |
| Q: the problem is that i still talk to my ex boyfriend who was my first love. and we both still care ... A: Well, there comes a time when you must take control of your life. And, leaving one man to go back to ... | |
| My g/f does not trust me at all | 4/29/2009 |
| Q: Good evening, I have been in a relationship for over two years now. While coming back from the ... A: Well, I don't believe you have the obligation to show her who is calling you on your cell. That is ... | |
| HELP | 4/27/2009 |
| Q: I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and he has been talking about engagement rings. I have a ... A: Well, it looks as if you have already made up your mind. Which shows me that you have a strong ... | |
| What can I do to make him forgive me? | 4/21/2009 |
| Q: I never wanted to cheat on my boyfriend, but I ended up having an affair with my sister's friend. He ... A: .... I'm going to tell you that forgiveness is a very powerful thing. One can utter the words "I ... | |
| What to do when your boyfriend told you he cheated on you? | 4/20/2009 |
| Q: My boyfriend of almost to year and I are in a long distance relationship but we always talk at least ... A: Well, it depends on how many times he has cheated on you and with how many women this has happened ... | |
| cheater boyfriend | 4/20/2009 |
| Q: My boyfrined cheats on me all the time. i catch him and he says he will stop, but then I found out a ... A: At this point, sweetie...You come first. Your health comes first. And, you need to forget about ... | |
| i want to trust again but dont want to get hurt again | 4/14/2009 |
| Q: my name is Amanda and I am hoping you can help me I have been with my boyfriend two years now and ... A: Well, you are always going to feel like there is a risk that he will cheat on you because he cheated ... | |
| Will he change? Is it worth waiting for? | 4/12/2009 |
| Q: We dated for 3 years and we broke up because he was unfaithful and I could never trust him again ... A: Nothing is impossible.....Do you not believe you deserve better in your life? If we feel like we ... | |
| trouble in paradise | 4/11/2009 |
| Q: Hey Melissa, me and my girlfriend have been going out for over 2 years, the problem is, she recently ... A: First and foremost, you need to get to a mental state of calmness. Because, what you just wrote is ... | |
| Is it true once a cheat always a cheat? | 4/6/2009 |
| Q: I am set to get married 5/30/09. My fiancee was married before & cheated on his wife @ the time ... A: And, he cheated on his first wife with her daughter? Not to mention he has a dating profile while he ... | |
| help | 4/2/2009 |
| Q: ive been with my girlfriend 4 , 2weeks an i feel like im just bein too clingy with her she liked me ... A: You need to do whatever you need to do to move on, hun..... In the long run, you will realize that ... | |
| Love is painful | 3/31/2009 |
| Q: I have been with my boyfriend for about 2 years, I love him and care for him but I'm just not ... A: If your new Mr. Perfect has a girlfriend, then, he isn't quite "perfect" at all, is he? I mean, what ... | |
| help | 3/31/2009 |
| Q: ive been with my girlfriend 4 , 2weeks an i feel like im just bein too clingy with her she liked me ... A: I hate to break it to you but, there is no "upper hand" in this situation. Being in a relationship ... | |
| cheating/being too clingy | 3/30/2009 |
| Q: i have been with my Boyfriend for four years, he just recently cheated on me. we have had problems ... A: The problem that I see here is that the trust in your relationship is not there. The respect isn't ... | |
| Stuck | 3/21/2009 |
| Q: Well I've been with my boyfriend on and off for about a year. When we first broke up, six months ... A: First and foremost, I am soooooooo sorry for my delay in replying to your email..... Well, it seems ... | |
| Is there such a thing as a fourth chance? | 3/21/2009 |
| Q: My ex-fiance wants another chance with me. He says he needs to know if that is something i want. We ... A: I'm going to be honest with you.....Even I miss my ex boyfriend every once in a while...I guess, you ... | |
| Help! | 3/18/2009 |
| Q: Alright I'll take this from the TOP. I am 17 years old and I met a really great guy who I am happy, ... A: It seems like you just answered your own question. You don't want a relationship. And, you're ... | |
| is he cheating | 3/17/2009 |
| Q: Is my man cheating? Once I can home there was a girls cell phone on the floor of our bedroom.He said ... A: Well, for one thing, finding a cell phone number doesn't mean he is cheating. And, if he wants sex ... | |
| I dont know what to do or what to think? | 3/4/2009 |
| Q: I am 19 and I am dating a guy who is 26. I have been dating him for like five months so far, but ... A: I can see your concern. Let me tell you something about men. They know from the start whether or not ... | |
| to cheat or not to cheat | 3/3/2009 |
| Q: Been with my man 10 years, married 4. Adore him. Just contacted by an old crush. My big 'one that ... A: It's been 10 years...You have a family, a husband. We ALL have our Mr. Big......And, if we could ... | |
| I want to cheat! | 3/2/2009 |
| Q: I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 years now. He cheated on me when our daughter was only 2 ... A: In all honesty? I think it is best to be honest with yourself and with your boyfriend and end this ... | |
| I've lost all trust in him and I'm miserable | 11/24/2008 |
| Q: Lets just start with alittle background information. He's 29 and I'm 22. We met when he was ... A: Trust is the #1 important thing in a relationship..Without trust, you have nothing to base your ... | |
| cheating both ways | 11/23/2008 |
| Q: im his mistress, i feel im cheated so i cheated, now he doesnt forgive me. He was my boss,i always ... A: Ask yourself this question......Why would you want someone who would cheat on his wife, someone he ... | |
| does my bf still has feelings for his ex | 9/18/2008 |
| Q: we are together for past 5 months now. initially he used to talk to his ex which he stopped after i ... A: Well, in the end, it's up to you whether you want to believe him or not. And, if you feel he is ... | |
| does my bf still has feelings for his ex | 9/16/2008 |
| Q: we are together for past 5 months now. initially he used to talk to his ex which he stopped after i ... A: I think that there are left over feelings between them. And, since he rushed into a relationship ... | |
| Should I Stay or Go? | 9/12/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and I have been together 2.5 years, we are each other's best friends and this is the ... A: There is no excuse for cheating. And, with today's technology, she could have gotten in touch with ... | |
| open relationship gone wrong | 9/11/2008 |
| Q: I am involved with a married man who is in an open relationship for the past several months. At ... A: Open relationships are a little tricky, because, there has to be set boundaries and rules. And, ... | |
| On and Off Relationship | 9/9/2008 |
| Q: i am a 20 year old gay man. i have been with my 25 year old fiance for over a year and a half now. ... A: In any relationship, there has to be boundaries and there has to be respect. Neither, which, your ... | |
| my girl has cheated on me 2 times | 9/7/2008 |
| Q: im 19 yrs old , me and my girl been together on and off for 2 yrs . the very first time we dated she ... A: People cheat for all types of reasons. In the end, regardless of the reason, it's unacceptable. ... | |
| Cheating Husband | 9/6/2008 |
| Q: I recently found out that my husband was having an emotional affair with a woman he works with and ... A: I think you should read the follow up message you just sent me.....Do you see anything wrong with ... | |
| Am I doomed to be a cheater? | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: My husband and I have been married for a little under a year. We've been together for 2 years. In ... A: If you could tell me what city and state you are in, I would glad to research some options for you. ... | |
| How to fix when you cheat | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: My boyfriend and I are from two different parts of the world and twice when we've been separated ... A: I think that perhaps, you should sit down and have a serious conversation about your relationship ... | |
| HELP! | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: im a 15 yr. old whtie male i go to high school still my freashmen year and my girl friend [disa] ive ... A: This is a lot for me to take in and give advise. Because you are in such a volatile state of mind. ... | |
| When the man you love cheats | 9/5/2008 |
| Q: I was in a relationship for two years with someone I was so blindly in love with. He was was world, ... A: I'm going to tell you that a man like that can not change his ways because he constantly uses women ... | |
| cheating | 8/30/2008 |
| Q: I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years. He cheated on me once aboiut 2 years ago. Whenm he ... A: The fact that he has used your career choice to blame you for his cheating makes him a real ... | |
| Cheated? | 8/13/2008 |
| Q: I recently returned from a 4 day trip out of town. When me and my girlfriend became intimate and ... A: The only thing I can tell you is that you can not force a confession out of someone. And, at this ... | |
| Angry and painfull heart | 8/8/2008 |
| Q: I am in a situation that i feel stuck and I cant seem to move on. My boyfriend that i've been dating ... A: OMG!!...I'm so sorry...Sometimes, it is hard for me to read very long emails, so I try to condense ... | |
| I got had! | 8/8/2008 |
| Q: I was involved with a married guy for over a year. It started off as a physical relationship, but ... A: Getting involved with a married man is only a recipe for disaster. He will never fully commit to you ... | |
| Cheated? | 8/6/2008 |
| Q: I recently returned from a 4 day trip out of town. When me and my girlfriend became intimate and ... A: If you and your girl have an open relationship. It is possible she may have been intimate while you ... | |
| Angry and painfull heart | 8/6/2008 |
| Q: I am in a situation that i feel stuck and I cant seem to move on. My boyfriend that i've been dating ... A: I'm so sorry you are going through this. You can't be angry at the unborn child, sweetie. It is not ... | |
| Cheating Boyfriend | 8/5/2008 |
| Q: I have been dating this guy named Killian for the past year. We met at a gymanstics camp in ... A: Well, sometimes, guys are pretty complicated. And, what they might want one day, they can easily not ... | |
| she did it while i was in iraq | 8/3/2008 |
| Q: basically heres the breakdown. we were engaged and planning our wedding. i have pics of her making ... A: I know exactly how you feel Corey.....But, getting back at her, isn't going to make you feel better. ... | |
| Cheating Husband | 8/3/2008 |
| Q: I recently found out that my husband was having an emotional affair with a woman he works with and ... A: He told you because of his "guilt" he wants a divorce? I would have expected counseling, not a ... | |
| The joke that my life is! | 7/29/2008 |
| Q: I'm a 34 year old married woman. I've had two sexual partners before I got married. The first was ... A: Please forgive the delay in my response....... Well, I do not condone cheating. Even if it ... | |
| Ex Wife | 7/22/2008 |
| Q: My Ex Wife begged me to come back for about 2 months then suddenly when they are planning a high ... A: Sometimes, the only way to get over someone is to just let them go. It may sound hard to do. But, we ... | |
| cheating strip poker? | 7/15/2008 |
| Q: What would happen to a relationship, where the guy has been perfect, then he played strip poker? ... A: At last an honest guy who won't keep, even if sounds miniscule, a thing away from his girl!!! I ... | |
| My boyfriend cheated twice! | 7/14/2008 |
| Q: Me and my boyfriend are in our early 20's and we have been 2gether 4 three years. He cheated on me ... A: First off, I am so sorry for the delay of my response...... I truly hope I can help you out! It ... | |
| I dont know | 7/12/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and i have been going out for 3 months. we were brought together by a mutual friend. ... A: Well, sometimes, when people start a new relationship, it is only natural that one would not want ... | |
| how do i deal with or get over a cheating fiancee | 6/25/2008 |
| Q: ive been in a relationship with my now fiancee for 3 1/2 yrs and i admit ive cheated on her very ... A: I think it is time that you both took the time to review this relationship. The fact that you ... | |
| What do i do? | 6/21/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend and I have been dating for 10 months. I am 17 and she is 15. I haven't been the best ... A: Well, I can honestly tell you, this is not a healthy relationship.....This little love triangle is ... | |
| cheating | 5/27/2008 |
| Q: I have been with my partner for 14yrs loyally and have never been with anyone else this woman has ... A: You need to be honest with your girlfriend. If after 14 years, you decided to give up on the ... | |
| is conversating cheating | 5/25/2008 |
| Q: if my husband has been conversating with a female behind my back for 6 months & when I caught them ... A: Yes, it is. If he is doing it behind your back, it is considered cheating, in the emotional sense, ... | |
| why do guy cheat? | 5/14/2008 |
| Q: When a guy tell u that "he love u" why would u go back to ur ex girlfriend? And tell her that you ... A: Only weak men have that issue......Strong men don't have the need to cheat or be confused....All men ... | |
| Why are all men different on the outside? | 5/14/2008 |
| Q: I m currently going out with a guy whom I don't know if I really like. I feel he is manipulative and ... A: Sometimes, we tend to confuse co-dependency with the need to be loved.....It is normal to feel ... | |
| Considering getting back with my ex | 5/14/2008 |
| Q: Last October, my girlfriend of 3 and a half years broke up with me out of the blue. I was at the ... A: There you have it....You just stated that you have zero tolerance for cheating.....SO, prepare ... | |
| boyfriend caught | 5/11/2008 |
| Q: I have been dating someone for about a year. We have everything in common but never noticed ... A: If I were given a dollar for all the times my ex called his current girlfriend and told her to take ... | |
| Cheating early in the relationship | 5/11/2008 |
| Q: I met this guy and really hit it off with him. We ended up talking for hours,etc. After a little ... A: He not only lied and cheated on you......He gave you an STD.....ENOUGH SAID! He doesn't deserve a ... | |
| Is he a liar? | 5/10/2008 |
| Q: I met a man on an internet dating site about 4 months ago. He seems like an honest and polite ... A: Well, you may want to sit down and have a serious discussion with him. As far as his suspicious ... | |
| My boyfriend cheated on me with my friend. | 5/6/2008 |
| Q: My boyfriend and i have been together for a little over a year now. We were the best of friends ... A: If you can't forgive him and move on.....then, you should not be in a relationship......You need to ... | |
| dealing with cheating? | 5/6/2008 |
| Q: I have been cheated on alot in my past relationships and I am dating this new girl and I really care ... A: Unless, she has given you a reason to mistrust her...Your past issues have nothing to do with her ... | |
| My boyfriend cheated on me with my friend. | 5/5/2008 |
| Q: My boyfriend and i have been together for a little over a year now. We were the best of friends ... A: If you really forgave your guy, you wouldn't be dwelling on this mistake.......You are still hurt ... | |
| Forgive or Forget | 5/4/2008 |
| Q: I have been with the same man for 7 years. The day before Valentines Day he decided to end the ... A: He needs to move on & so do you. You need to be on your own,. Away from him. He disrespected you and ... | |
| How Do I Get Over A Cheating Boyfriend? | 5/3/2008 |
| Q: I had found out two days ago that my boyfriend was cheating on me at the start of our relationship! ... A: It is obvious that you want to move on.....Leave things the way are......It's over....And, you are ... | |
| Cheated on me with my sister. | 5/2/2008 |
| Q: I'm seventeen and I've been with my current boyfriend for almost four months. Thing have been really ... A: First of all, your sister crossed the line. And, your mother, although, she meant well, should not ... | |
| Cheated, Heart broken and Alone | 5/1/2008 |
| Q: I moved from alberta to ontario to be with this girl amanda c. we had a good relationship for a ... A: I'm going to be honest....Brutally honest.......And, there is no other way to say it......She ... | |
| Another round or knock out | 4/30/2008 |
| Q: My boyfriend an I have been together for a year and a half. The first incident, my suspicions rose ... A: I think you need someone to validate what you already know deep in heart to be true. He is cheating ... | |
| Respect | 4/28/2008 |
| Q: Do you think it's appropriate for a people involved in a relationship to be socializing one-on-one ... A: There is nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex.....Having brunch or lunch with the ... | |
| relationships | 4/23/2008 |
| Q: what are the signs of someone cheating A: 1) They go to another room when they get a call or text 2) they make excuses not to go out with you ... | |
| Hot Men Ugly Women | 4/22/2008 |
| Q: I've noticed something. I've seen that very very sexy men, such as those guys that are typically ... A: Well, I'm not a gorgeous woman....lol.....but, being that I was dumped for a very un-pretty woman a ... | |
| How do I get passed my rage toward my cheating ex? | 4/19/2008 |
| Q: This story is a very long and complicated one but one filled with flags - so I'll give you the short ... A: HAve you gone to court on this matter? Perhaps, yuo need a mediator and court to help you out in ... | |
| Pregnant and Going Crazy | 4/16/2008 |
| Q: I'm 24 and last year I married a man that got me pregnant and started to cheat and ... A: It's not that men change every time you get pregnant....You just keep picking the wrong men at the ... | |
| passionate | 4/10/2008 |
| Q: I'm interested in this man. But he has had like a million girls because he used to be a pro athlete ... A: Well, it all depends on what he defines as "passionate"..... It's hard to tell what his intentions ... | |
| IS this CONSIDERED cheating? (does it sound like there are plans to cheat) | 4/10/2008 |
| Q: are these some sure signs a guy is planning/hoping to cheat with you that female friends should look ... A: Well, you have them listed down very well....They are ALL good signs that he/she is either cheating ... | |
| What is he hiding? | 4/9/2008 |
| Q: My boyfriend of two years & I live together as well as work at the same company. This is both a ... A: I hate to tell you this, but, that is a sign that there is something going on with him and that ... | |
| Wow.. | 4/9/2008 |
| Q: This is kind of a long story, I guess I'll start at the beginning. My boyfriend and I have been ... A: It looks as if you have a very confused and indecisive boyfriend. Who has some expectation of what ... | |
| my bf kissed another girl when he was drunk, saw it on a friends's computer | 4/8/2008 |
| Q: in my thinking he has cheated, he went out with his workmates got absoultely drunk, he says he does ... A: If this is a first time offense for your boyfriend, and he truly doesn't remember it ... | |
| big problem or a simple mistake? | 4/6/2008 |
| Q: My husband and I have been together for 9 years, married for 5 and earlier this week I found out ... A: Your husband obviously has a problem......And, is using alcohol as an excuse for his actions. I'm ... | |
| Rage towards my ex | 4/3/2008 |
| Q: My (ex) husband woke up one morning, told me he loved me and went to work. Later that afternoon he ... A: What you are feeling is normal. Only when the rage becomes unhealthy, where you want to physically ... | |
| fiancee for 10 years was married all along | 4/2/2008 |
| Q: I had a long distance relationship for ten years, the guy was in the military and he and his wife ... A: I'm so sorry that jerk wasted 10 years of your life. Now, that you know his lie.......I can imagine ... | |
| she cheated after 3 years | 4/1/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend of 3 years took a job in California and moved there in August of 2007 from here in ... A: She needs to prove to you that she is trust worthy. And, I really don't believe she is ready to be ... | |
| she cheated after 3 years | 4/1/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend of 3 years took a job in California and moved there in August of 2007 from here in ... A: I don't recommend you "killing her with kindness"....She doesn't deserve even that from you. You're ... | |
| Cheating? | 3/31/2008 |
| Q: I have been with my boyfriend a year and a half. He swears I am the only woman for him and wants to ... A: I really want to help you out. But, I'm going to need a bit more info.....Are you an adult or a ... | |
| Is he being unfaithful? | 3/30/2008 |
| Q: I have been engaged since December 28th of last year. Everything was going great. But then my ... A: I know that this is the worst feeling in the world. And, having your man act so unlike himself must ... | |
| she cheated after 3 years | 3/29/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend of 3 years took a job in California and moved there in August of 2007 from here in ... A: As someone who was in in a 10 yr. relationship, who found out, after 7 yrs. of what I believed to be ... | |
| My girlfriend told me she cheated and I feel weird now | 3/25/2008 |
| Q: My girlfriend told me that she cheated about a month after she did it. I feel weird and everytime I ... A: Asking someone how they cheated on you is asking for pain and punishment. Asking someone why they ... | |
| guy with girlfriend | 3/25/2008 |
| Q: hey dennis. theres this guy at school i like and im pretty sure he likes me back too. cuz we always ... A: Why would you to like to hook up with someone who is attached to another person? I understand, he ... | |
| Not sure what to do anymore! | 3/23/2008 |
| Q: My story is long and complicated but its a doozy to me. A year and a half ago my so-called friend ... A: I think it is time that you & your boyfriend found a place of your own without any room mates and ... | |
| He Cheated On Me | 3/19/2008 |
| Q: I was with my boyfriend for 3 months when i found an e-mail that he had written to an old "friend" ... A: It looks to me that he is taking advantage of your love and kindness. He does not deserve you and ... | |
| I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!! | 3/12/2008 |
| Q: I met this guy on the internet. We were together for 7 months. Every time I tried to see him, he ... A: Well, it looks as if the writing is clearly on the wall. And, you , for some reason, are refusing to ... | |
| Girlfriend Gave Her Virginity To Someone Else | 3/7/2008 |
| Q: I dated a girl for 8 months and we were incredibly in love with each other. She lived at home and ... A: Well, It seems that you are relying your happiness on one single person. And, frankly, that is ... | |
Melissa Durazo
Top Expert on this page
Expertise
I will not help you cheat, so please do not ask me how to. If you are having issues with a cheater or suspect your mate of cheating, then, I can help you deal with the issue. I may have the answers on how to confront and deal with a cheating man or woman. I can answer questions concerning the physical and mental anguish that a cheating mate can cause. advise how to move on from this type of relationship. Or, advise on how to forgive and work on fulfilling a new start. I can also help in recognizing the signs and lies of a cheater. As well, as how to catch one in the act.
Experience
I was in a 10 yr. relationship, in which the last 3 years of it was nothing but lies, cheating & emotional abuse. I almost lost my job, my friends and family because I could not let go of this co-dependent relationship. I went through a life changing experience and I came out realizing that I was stronger than I thought I was. I learned that no one is responsible for my happiness and well being. I also learned, that I will make mistakes, I will fall down, but, in the end, it's how I face the problem that will get me through the day.......
Education/Credentials
The school of Life. Life is all the education I have ever needed.
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