Expert: Anika Rynn - 9/12/2006

Question
My boyfriend and father of my baby has been in jail for about 14 months.  He should be out within the next 4 months.  So anyway, I told myself and him I would not have sex or anything while he was gone.  But this past weekend I got really drunk at a party and I messed up big time.  I had sex with another man, but I stopped him before it was over becuase I was so upset.  I just started crying and couldn't stop.  I honestly feel terrible about this.  I love him so much.  So what do you think? Do you think he can forgive me?

Answer
I don't think you should completely suffer for a mistake he made; in al fairness you have also made a mistake. If your relationship is honest and open you should be able to tell him and try to work through it. You need to tell him regardless of his current situation. I realize though that it will be rather difficult to tell him in jail, if you can he will have the time and space to think about everything. If you want to save your relationship that is your best option. I hope everything works out and he understands and you both can work through this. E-mail me again and tell me how things go. -Anikia-