Expert: Greg - 8/13/2001

Question
Greg-
Hi, I am 18 in 2 weeks I will be going away to college 250 miles from where I live. In high school I knew a coach that I think is extremely attractive. I ran cross country and track and while he did not coach that, he'd always be around the gym, as coaches often are, so I got to know him a little.

He wants to visit me in college.  It is VERY clear there is sexual tension between us.  Let's just say I definetly know he's attracted to me he's made it quite clear. The problems is I have a boyfriend of 2 years and I even want to marry him. He is coming to college with me. I love my boyfriend to death, but this coach is really tempting. I feel horrible, but I can't help it. He is married with 3 kids, ages 7, 3, and 1. Am I a terrible person for having lustful thoughts about him? He's almost 40, and I'm 18, but he is incredibly attractive. What advise can you give me about this? Should I let him visit me? I know if he does the tension might be too much for me to take. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend or his marriage. Please help me! I don't know why I feel this way.  

Answer
What you feel is, as you said Lust. Lust isnt love, and shouldnt be confused with it. Speaking from a guys point of view, if you REALLY loved your boyfreind, you would keep the thoughts just as that, thoughts. Dont presue them, tell your coach not to come. The pain that would cause your boyfreind would be un matched by any other pain. Dont do it to him if you really love him. It would devaste him, and cause a break up. Is 2 years of love worth 2 hours of lust??? I wouldnt think so.

BUT......

Now, if you WANT to do it.Regardless of love, even though I believe it is wrong, I will help as well.

Make Sure your boyfreind is away, for a few hours. Invite the coach over, buy condoms because you dont want to have a child with him..trust me. Slowly work in a kiss, and if what you say is true, the rest will "cum" naturally.

As Always, Thanks for chosing me as your expert, and please rate and , if you wish, nominate me for Expert of the Month.

Thanks Again.


Sincerely,
 Greg