Expert: RITA - 4/15/2004

Question
My gal and I have been going out for about 6 years.I'm 43,she's 36.About 6 weeks ago,she and I along with my best friend and his wife went out to our favorite bar to send off my best friend who was going for a month to Egypt.
After our time at the bar we went for a slice of pizza.The pizza would be a few minutes said the employee.I came out of the shop,asked my buddie's wife where my gal was.She said she was down the street at the 7-11. I walked over and saw her and my buddy at the back of the store,partly concealed from the road by a column. I saw him lean in and kiss her on the lips 4 times. I confronted her immediately and she said she was sorry.Later,I confronted him and he gave me a watered-down version,"A couple of pecks on the cheek,I hold your girl in affection and was saying goodbye before a long trip."
She told me that,"it just happened,it wasn't planned." And,later on,"It's not like I think of it all the time,it meant nothing."
 My buddy a)tried to conceal this act
 b)initiated the act    c)gave me a diluted  version of events. d)I have never seen him do this with any other female friends.  As a result I have trouble trusting him.
My gal has always been friendly with him and I know they both find each other attractive.Often,while at a bar,when my girl goes to the bathroom,he will follow shortly after,I often find them talking near the washroom as a result.
 The kisses,although not sexual intercourse,was still too intimate for my liking.My girlfriend agreed if the situation had been reversed,she would have been hurt too.
As well,when my buddy is talking to my girl,and another woman distracts his attention,she seems to appear upset,hurt.
 My question:Can I trust my girlfriend?
 Thankyou in advance for your response.

Answer
Hello Don and thank you for your question...I will try to help.
In a word, "no"...and that goes for your buddy too. Friends are supposed to respect each other and not go beyond the boundries of that friendship by kissing the girlfriend and sneaking to the bathroom to chit chat in the hall.
Follow your gutt instinct, I always recommend, and don't tolerate any type of disrespect by either one of them, afterall, it is you who shows others how to treat you. As for the girlfriend, I would tell her under no circumstances will you allow any type of communication between the two, and the friend...well, he's not much of a friend, now is he? In fact, he's a rat! Trying to pick up on someone else's girlfriend, is a big no no, and one of the rules of friendship that should never be broken,,he's shown that that doesn't matter to him. So, I leave the choices up to you...please tell me how it goes..
Take care