Expert: Don - 7/31/2007

Question
I have been in a relationship for 11 1/2 years. We have both been divorced and I am not interested in getting married again.  We have lived together for 7 years. Last year I found text messages on his phone that were pretty obvious about him having an affair with a married woman. I confronted him about the situation and after a few rocky months we decided that I would give him another chance. He never admitted to an affair and just said they were friends but the text messages confirmed otherwise. I have been checking his phone and noticed that he is still in contact with this woman. I do not believe in cheating and he knows that if I found out that he was still doing this that it would be over. Why would a man risk it all for a married woman? He was outed before and was embarresed to go around all of our friends. It is obvious he just layed low until the heat was off from me to take up where he left off. Is it all just about sex? Can a career cheater change?

Answer
No a career cheater can't change, him being a career cheater should tell you that. Being a career cheater implies that he has done it repeatedly over and over and over again.

Chances are if he already cheated and got away with and you still kept the relationship going, he's going cheat again because he knows you he can cheat and you'll let him come back.

He's not going change and he'll continue to cheat until you leave him.

I hope this helped and good luck.