Expert: Don - 5/12/2007

Question
alrite I have a complex one. I have a girlfriend who I have been with on and off for about 4 years. I have been away for like 4 years and I would visit her so we kept in touch with no real ties. But I have been back for almost a year and we have been together since but when I first came back I messed up and cheated on her . Now she always thinks I'm doing something when that is not the case.So for that reason I always think she is trying to get payback or just doesn't care anymore. I have been gone a long time and she is not the same girl I use to know. So she might be capable of these things. What also puts me on is how she is quick to say she doesn't care or it doesn't matter when we get into arguments. Or the fact that she doesn't pay attention nor want to hang out with me anymore. She gives her attention and time to her "Friends"  more than her "Boyfriend" ... please give me some answers ....JASON  

Answer
It sounds like the two of you need some time apart. Maybe the stress of the relationship and the fact that you go away and then come back is having a negative effect on the relationship and the fact that you cheated isn't helping the matters.

I think you should give her a little time to breathe and be alone, that way she can realize what she is missing when you aren't around and she'll want you that much more.

Just give her a little time to get her mind straight.

I hoped this helped and good luck