Expert: Pamela Enders - 7/16/2009

Question
hey. i have a question about cheerleading. i tried out for my high school cheerleading team last year (i was in 10th grade) and didn't make it. i was really upset because i have wanted to be a cheerleader for so long even as a little girl in elementary school. when i hear anything about cheerleading i feel like crying since i didnt make it..but yeah i didn't make it and still want to cheer but I'm scared about trying out again because to try out next year it is mandatory to make it to varsity since im going to be a senior..and last year i didnt make it because i wasnt smiling the whole time...do you think i should try out again or just give up on my dream?

Answer
Dear Patricia,

Please don’t give up on your dream.  Instead, let’s put it into perspective, ok?

You say you didn’t get in because you weren’t smiling.  Well, that is an easy thing to fix!  Sometimes when girls are concentrating on their motions and moves, they forget to smile.  This can happen when you are more focused on doing the right moves than you are about connecting to the audience.  Cheerleading is about both the technical performance and connecting to the audience and this simply takes practice and experience.

Can you set up a practice schedule?  The more you practice the moves, the more you’ll be able to focus on the audience (the judges) and smile.  When you practice, be sure you practice smiling, too!  Really! It may seem weird but it’s important.  

After the last tryout, did you talk to the coach and/or judges to find out if there were any other reasons why you didn’t get in?  It’s good to know this so you know what you need to work on this time.

Here is an excerpt from my blog and from my new product – The Mental Game of Cheerleading: Tryouts!  (Yep – I created a 2-CD audio set plus a 50 page workbook all about tryouts – if you’re interested, go to http://www.confidentcheerleading.com  and look in the “Products” section.)

So, here’s the excerpt:
Previous failures: If you tried out before and didn’t make it, you may experience exceptional doubt about your ability to make it this time.
Solution: First, if you are trying out for the second or third time, congratulations on your courage and determination. You may not know this, but many expert cheerleaders didn’tmake the squad the first or even second time either!
So-what to do about your doubts? It’s helpful to have a healthy perspective on your past attempt. Instead of focusing on the fact that you failed, emphasize the fact that you tried.
One of my favorite quotes (by Anais Nin) is this: “Life expands or contracts in proportion to one’s courage.”  I think that this applies to all of you who have the courage and determination to try out for something that you want.
So remember, each time you try something that is scary you are developing courage and you are expanding your life.
The other perspective that is helpful is that of a scientist, meaning an objective perspective. One of the most helpful phrases to use is “isn’t that interesting.” So for example you might say, “Isn’t it interesting that I didn’t make the team.” This provides a bit of distance and objectivity. So why didn’t you? Have you thought about it? Have you listed what went well and what needed improvement? If not, why not?
Again I have heard from people who did not get in and felt devastated but got so immersed in their grief that they failed to assess why they didn’t make the team except perhaps in a general way. The time right before tryouts is not the time to feel sorry for yourself! If you want to be a champion you need to think and act like one. So dry your tears and get out your notebook and make that list. And then create your plan of action. In other words once you know why you didn’t make the team you will be able to address those problems and determine what you need to do differently this next time.
So that’s an excerpt.  To read more about tryouts in my blog, go to http://www.confidentcheerleadingblog.com/category/tryouts/ .

So, to summarize:

1.   Don’t give up on your dream but do create a plan of action to help you realize your dream!
2.   Find out what didn’t go well last time so you can work on those things this time.
3.   Set aside lots of time to rehearse and remember to rehearse the smile, too!
4.   When you rehearse, take your time and think about what you are going to do, see it with your mind’s eye, exhale slowly and then begin.
5.   You might want to watch videos of cheerleaders and really study what makes them special, then try to imitate!
6.   Remember that cheerleading is about technical accuracy but it’s also about connecting with the audience.
7.   Coaches want girls who are enthusiastic, motivated, friendly, and who are committed to doing the work, so show the coach you are all those things and your chances will improve.

Good luck to you!

Dr. Pam