Expert: Victoria Hamilton - 10/12/2009

Question
Hello, I will be attending a Chinese Wedding next month for one of my husbands employees that live there.  She does speak very good English, not sure about her new husband. I would like to know what to wear and what would be an appropriate gift.  She has stated to my husband that casual dress was fine. Thank you.

Answer
Dear Leslie,

Hi and thanks for the question!

I have attended 3 Chinese weddings since living in China and have a fourth to go to next weekend so yes, this question is one I always wonder about as it differs from couple to couple. The first three were mixed marriages so they werent so strict, but the fourth will be a chinese chinese wedding so i'll have to think a little differently.

A colour to be avoided definitely is white as that signifies death in China. Red is a very lucky colour and black is not usually worn to weddings as it is not done in the West either. BUT, every wedding I have been to there have been a mish mash of colours and styles too. You will see that the majority of the couples friends and families apart from immediate family will wear regular clothes and will not get dressed up. So nothing you wear will be too informal as there will always be a whole lot of people who look like theyve just gone out to the supermarket and stopped by on their way back home!

Apart from the above mentioned colours, you are fine with anything else...trousers, dresses, skirts etc, obviously no jeans (although many of the Chinese will come decked out in Jeans and tshirts!) But it's time to get dressed up and have fun!

As for gifts, Chinese usually give 'hong bao' which means 'red package' and its a small red envelope that they just put money in so the couple can buy what they like. If you dont want to go down that route, just buy what you would usually buy for a Western couple for their wedding...BUT no clocks as that signifies death too!

Hope you have a lot of fun!!!

Victoria.