Expert: Dr Eddy Cheong - 3/16/2008

Question
Is it appropriate for a man to bring pre-existing issues into a relationship and expect the woman to share the burden (responsibility) of those issues?  Without concern as to whether or not the woman has the emotional and/or spiritual capacity to share those burdens?
I feel that my boyfriend's needs exceed my capacity to give, but because we are in a relationship, he feels that I should still be willing and able to give him the help he needs, without expecting or receiving anything in return until he is in a position financially to reciprocate.  His view is based on his interpretation of Galatians 6:2, "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."


Answer
It is true that the Bible commands us to do good especially for the household of God..

Galatians 6:10:
10Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

And the verse you quoted (Galatians 6:2) is also certainly relevant.

From your question, I gather that your boyfriend's requests is centred mainly on financial considerations. Apart from the verses in Galatians Chapter 6, there are also other financial responsibilities that a Christian has, viz,

1. Giving to God  (Matthew 22:21). In this respect please also see my article at http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Troy/9519/tithe.html
2. Caring for family, relatives, children
1 Tim 5:8
8 If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
NIV
2 Cor 12:14
After all, children should not have to save up for their parents, but parents for their children.
NIV (verse above quoted in part)
3.Caring for parents...
Ephesians 6:2:
2"Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise
4. Giving to the poor
Matt 6:3
3 But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth:
KJV Notice that the Lord says “when thou doest alms” not “if thou doest”

You mentioned your boyfriend's needs. Needs in Biblical context extends only to food, shelter and clothing.See Luke 12:22-31
If a christian brother or sister has these needs then we should provide for them as we are able to. More than this, you need to hear from God directly (Rhema). Galatians 6:2 and 6:10 therefore should not be taken out of their correct contexts.