Expert: Phillip Senn - 3/21/2009

Question
Hello,

I once lived with a roommate who was verbally abusive to me. Every day she would scream at me and say nasty horrible things to me and would enjoy that I was upset.

I believe she was jealous of my beauty and intelligence.

I had another roommate, who would laugh when the above would go one.

They were really cruel and horrible to me. They have caused me a lot of mental anguish and pain and trauma after the vicious screaming attacks at me.

these women were a lot younger than me, 22-25 years old, and I was 30 when this happened. so they were immature.

I had a lot of class, sophistication, manners, and elegance that they didnt, and they tried whatever they could to knock me down.

The day I moved out, they both looked at me and said "Ana, you're the best"

Will they ever regret their actions?

Answer
Ana,

While these women may never regret their actions, there is another side to this that I believe you need to deal with. When Jesus died on the cross for our sins, He was doing so to reconcile us to the Father. God forgave us our sins because Jesus died for us.

The Scriptures say that we have an obligation to forgive others, even as God, for Christ's sake, forgave us. It is clear from your correspondence that there is an issue of unforgiveness. If you choose to harbor this in your heart, then you will always be causing yourself more harm. Release this issue into the hands of the Lord who will cleanse you from all unrighteousness. "If we confess our sins (agree with God about them), He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

These women will also stand before God some day. Pray for them. If they are not saved, pray for their salvation. If they are believers, pray that the Lord will open their eyes to the hurt they have caused. If possible, make an effort to be the one seeking reconciliation with them. In other words, don't wait for them to make the first move. Just as Jesus, while we were yet sinners, died for our sins, we should make the first move to reconcile with those around us.

With Love In Christ,
Phillip Senn