Christianity -- Christian Living/Keeping Faith in God's Answers


I'm 35 and have a "friend" at work, who I've wanted to date.  Since we work together, I backed off.  

Then, one day I prayed a prayer just as I had done many times.  One of... "Dear God, is she the one?"

Later in the day I got my answer... YES!  It's long story, but let me just say I was flowing with tears and I knew it was the answer.

For days afterward, I treated her with calm and patience, knowing this strong Christian woman would also be told in time.

Now, it's been several weeks, and after several rejections from her... I'm beginning to doubt.

Ryan, that's my questions.  How do you stay in faith when your prayer has been answered?  Noah didn't think, "This is nuts. I'm not finishing this boat."  He persevered.  How does a person find such faith?

Sorry for the long question.
Thanks so much for your time.
God Bless.


Thanks for your question.  I know that romantic love and partnership is a tremendously important matter, so I can understand your desire for understanding and clarity from God.

It's hard to answer this without knowing more about the answer you received from the Lord.  

For the sake of offering an answer, though, I will assume that God has indeed told you that she is "the one".  If this is the case, then you'll have to consider how your partnership will come about.  If it is pleasing to God that you two should be together, you still have several ways to approach her.  Will you expect God to create feelings for you within her heart?  Will God expect you to woo her?  You see, the conviction that you ought to be together does not make it happen.  You have a part to play.  

Again, I don't know how you're going about your approach to her.  I don't know what led to the several rejections.  With limited information, it's hard to assess the situation well.

I would encourage you to act in faith that God is involved, but also act with the awareness that her heart must be won.  Don't approach her as the woman who must know that God wants you together; approach her as a woman who has affections that must be won over.  It sounds like she's worth waiting for, working for and praying for.  In the meantime, ask God to mold you into the kind of man you ought to be for such a woman.  This may be His time to prepare you and shape you for such a relationship.  Focus on that process of preparation while you show here love and respect.  Trust God and her with the timing.

Please feel free to follow-up with further questions/comments about these things.  I'm open to continuing the conversation.  

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Ryan Parish


I can answer just about any question about Christian living, believing that the Biblical revelation is meant to deal with all of life. Though not every modern issue is addressed specifically in the Bible, I feel confident in applying the grand principles of love, submission and Christ-likeness to all issues. I can't answer some questions definitively simply because God has not given detailed information on some matters. I can draw valid conclusions from what God has revealed, though.


I was raised in the church from my childhood, and have had an interest in God, the Bible and spiritual things from a very early age. At around the age of 15, I felt led to pursue a future in full time ministry. I've been in professional ministry since 2003, but was very active in teaching and encouraging Christians long before that. I preached my first sermon at the age of 15 and have found great joy in teaching God's truths ever since!

Pastor of New Hope Community Church; member of the Christian Ministers Association.

BA in preaching from Hope International University (Fullerton, CA); full time pastor for five years; continually engaged in reading and studying to further my understanding of Scriptures.

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